Only David Essex and snooker players should wear waistcoats.

At my aunt's crematorium funeral my uncle was invited to 'say a few words'. He spoke solely about what food items were in the buffet at the hall afterwards and how to get to it. Absolutely nothing about her. That trying desperately not to snort-laugh farce moment… #TheArchers

Indeed.

at my dad's funeral the undertakers nearly dropped the coffin when they were setting it down at the front of the church!

I then got an ad lib into my eulogy 'people of Bristol, you don't have to choose between red and blue, you can have both' #cpfc