Nolan Vancey
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nolanvancey.bsky.social
Nolan Vancey
@nolanvancey.bsky.social
540 followers 500 following 530 posts
Rhymes with fancy. Writer of kinky wet and messy erotica and romance. Minors DNI. 🔞 Author of ADAM'S APPETITE https://books2read.com/u/4X0nP1
https://www.patreon.com/NolanVancey
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nolanvancey.bsky.social
Post your warning label!
Warning: area patrolled by goth girls with big stompy boots
November 27, 2025 at 4:27 PM
nolanvancey.bsky.social
The story in your mind vs. the story you write
Art by Terry Moore. Detailed illustration of young woman drinking a cocktail labeled "studio sketch" on left; crude drawing of stick figure holding bottle labeled "convention sketch" on right
November 27, 2025 at 3:44 PM
nolanvancey.bsky.social
There was also a producer called Kaolumbia who did some Christmas-themed quicksand shoots(they're still on UMD dot NET):
Platinum blonde girl wearing Santa hat and red fur-trimmed bikini up to her chest in thick mud
November 20, 2025 at 8:57 PM
nolanvancey.bsky.social
Richard Sala did some horror-themed Christmas illustrations that might suit you (there's more where this came from, I just searched "Richard Sala Christmas"):
Illustration by Richard Sals of an undead-looking Santa carrying a redheaded babe dressed as an elf
November 20, 2025 at 8:50 PM
nolanvancey.bsky.social
Doing some research for a #pie story I've been hammering away at, and history is coming alive!
Keaton explained in his memoirs that he and Arbuckle became very specific with their recipe for the pies created for onscreen flight. For instance, if the target was a blonde, custard was not used; the filling was a mixture of blackberries, flour, and water, topped with whipped cream. When a brunette was to be hit, a lemon-meringue filling was substituted for blackberries, which showed up better on the screen against a darker complexion. In addition, “Two crusts are cooked, one inside the other, until brittle. The double crust prevents crumbling when your fingers slide across the bottom in delivering the confectionery. Tin plates are never used because of the danger of cutting the recipient’s eye, something that could happen when the plate slides sideways at the crucial moment of impact.”
November 17, 2025 at 3:43 AM
nolanvancey.bsky.social
Here's some art I put together for this last year. Rest assured I have not improved my skills in any way in the time since.
#messy #pies
a stick figure woman holding a pie threatens two other stick figure women and says "Get ready for some humble pie." Caption beneath reads Patreon dot com slash Nolan Vancey
October 29, 2025 at 4:42 PM
nolanvancey.bsky.social
For #quicksand day, I invite you to explore The Magoopsie, an attraction you won't soon forget:
www.patreon.com/posts/134706...
“Sometimes I like to come in here when I’m in a bad mood,” the guide continued. “The Magoopsie is . . . well, it’s a good listener.” Karen could have sworn the guide blushed, and she noticed for the first time how young she was: pretty, but barely out of her teens. Karen shook her head in confusion. “But that makes it sound like it’s . . . alive,” she protested. Another bubble formed on the surface and expanded until it popped, giving Karen the distinct impression of an eye, winking at her. Again, the mood of the attraction was certainly working on her imagination. Hadn’t she pictured the Magoopsie luring victims into its depths to drown, like one of those plants that smelled sweet but closed around any insect foolish enough to land on it?
September 19, 2025 at 9:16 PM
nolanvancey.bsky.social
Share where your #fetish started
Scene from 1981 movie STRIPES: John Candy as Ox in mud-wrestling ring, surrounded and overpowered by half-naked, mud-covered babes
September 8, 2025 at 12:10 AM
nolanvancey.bsky.social
#currentlyreading MESSY by Colora De Rosa. I was excited to get my hands on this one, a contemporary poly (MFF) romance that happens to center the #WAM ( #wetandmessy ) kink (lifestyle?). I'm only in the early chapters, but since far I'm enjoying it. #romance #books #booksky 🔞✒️📚❤️
Book cover: MESSY by Corola De Rosa. Heart-shaped cake, partially smashed, on pink background
September 5, 2025 at 3:02 PM
nolanvancey.bsky.social
See a web, post a web
Screenshot from old black and white cartoon of a spider with shoes and gloves catching a fly in his web
August 21, 2025 at 7:46 PM
nolanvancey.bsky.social
The question "What is the Magoopsie?" is teased throughout, but suffice it to say this one will interest #mud and #quicksand enthusiasts. Just don't drop anything over the guardrail unless you want a firsthand encounter!
1/3 “You go on,” she said. Perhaps it was the prospect of a moment or two without the kids, or just her curiosity, but she felt that there was something here she needed to see. It was, she told herself, nothing more than a patch of mud; why would it be anything else? But then, why couldn’t she take her eyes off it? Even in the artificial light of the exhibit hall, the colors on the surface shifted subtly, ranging from slate grays to rich chocolate browns that glistened invitingly. It reminded Karen of a decadent dessert; it may have looked like pudding, but the aroma that filled the room, trapped inside, was harder to place: fragrant as fresh earth, but with an unplaceable spice. What was it? Perhaps in the prehistoric past, like the paintings in the lobby, the scent spread outward across the plains, attracting the animals—and people—who fell prey to it. 2/3 Her first thought was to get down on her knees and reach for the ring, but now that she was on the other side of the guardrail, it didn’t look so close. Her heart pounded in her chest and she took a deep breath, as if preparing for a leap into the unknown. Just a few steps out into the mud and a few steps back, she told herself. Holding onto the rail with one hand, she tentatively extended one leg and planted her foot. The surface of the mud was wet and gelid, but not as cold as she had feared. Perhaps it only seemed warm in comparison to the icy air conditioning; if it were outside, as it had been since time immemorial, would it be temptingly cool on a hot day like this one? Liquid squeezed between Karen’s toes, sending shivers up her calf and leg; she hadn’t squished mud with her feet since she had been a little girl, and she couldn’t quite remember if it had felt like this. 3/3 It wasn’t only the need to concentrate that had forced her to take hold of herself: beneath the intensely focused surface, Karen was surprised to realize that she was excited. It was partly the fear of losing her wedding band, combined with the awareness that she was now surrounded on all sides by sticky mud, and that it would only take one tiny slip to end up in it. But there was anticipation as well: how triumphant she would feel retrieving her ring and escaping the pull of the Magoopsie! It was a challenge, and it had been so very long since Karen had felt challenged. Wobbling, she returned her focus to stepping carefully, but the glance at the mud and the thought that it would never come out of her clothes if she fell in made her wonder if she should have removed them as well as her sandals. A jolt of excitement—or panic—shot through her at the thought. Careful, she told herself, you’re really losing it.
July 31, 2025 at 5:03 PM
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I had fun with this one: Kerry, Mondy, and Ducks share stories of fundraising events from their past. I was pleased to cover pies, wetlook, and mud. Back in the early days of #WAM on the internet, videos came in anthology format, and producers liked to offer something for everyone.
1/3 Kerry chuckled. “You just reminded me of someone. When I was the captain of the cheerleading team in high school, we did a fundraiser for a trip, and that was the same thing our coach said: ‘Draw a crowd.’ So we came up with the idea of a ‘pie your teacher’ event.” Ducks snorted. “I can tell that wasn’t your idea.” “No, but I agreed it would get attention, and Coach Jan was willing to go along with it. If we raised a certain amount of money, she would let us pie her in the face at a school assembly. People thought it was funny, and you know, a lot of the boys liked Coach Jan. She was pretty, so we sold a lot of tickets. We made our goal so fast, one of the girls suggested we should get other teachers involved.” 2/3 We organized a carwash for a Saturday morning, and it was hot day like this, so we thought, ‘Why not make it a bikini carwash?’” “Mondy—” Kerry said knowingly. “Okay, it was my idea. I wasn’t as big yet as I am now—” Mondy lifted her boobs, currently encased in an Eta Pi tee shirt that clung wetly in the humid air. It had clearly been too warm to bother with a bra. Mondy had been curvaceous when Kerry met her in the fall, but it seemed as if the proverbial “freshman fifteen” had all gone to her chest. “But I had this new red bikini I wanted to try out. You know my mom [a story that hasn’t been told yet –ed.]; she thought it was too revealing for me to wear to the public pool, and the country club had a dress code. I knew she wouldn’t bother coming to the carwash, so it was perfect. 3/3 Every day for weeks before the event, members of the club came to school in cosplay to advertise. One day Chun-Li, the next day Lady Dimitrescu, and so on. That got a lot of attention—you’d be surprised how much people will pay attention to ‘nerds’ when they’re dressed like hot people. I went to school as Raven from the Teen Titans and Faye Valentine from Cowboy Bebop, and a couple of others, before the administration cracked down on costumes at school. We were getting a little too much attention, and they said it was distracting. The boys would ask if we were climbing into the ring dressed like that, and that’s when we knew we had them hooked. On the last day of school before the event, the girls in the club dressed as the Sailor Scouts, and the boys went as characters from JoJo. We all got sent home for breaking the no costumes rule, but it was worth it—we had made sure that everyone would come to our event.”
July 31, 2025 at 4:50 PM
nolanvancey.bsky.social
Your pfp is your therapist

"Pies, you say? How . . . colorful, but what happens behind closed doors, you know. It's always the quiet ones!"

Cover art from Exciting Love, a 1950s romance pulp
Cover of Exciting Love magazine. Portrait of stylish woman in green against a yellow background. She touches her cheek with one gloved hand: bored or intrigued, who can say?
July 22, 2025 at 11:17 PM
nolanvancey.bsky.social
Summer vacation: a time for road trips. A time for discovering roadside attractions, mystery spots, and tourist traps. And for one young mother of two, perhaps a time of self-discovery when she encounters the enigma of THE MAGOOPSIE. Available to subscribers now.
www.patreon.com/posts/134706...
Statues of prehistoric mastodons, one half-submerged in tar pit as others look on from shore. Caption reads The Magoopsie, www.patreon.com/nolanvancey
July 22, 2025 at 5:02 PM
nolanvancey.bsky.social
prehistoric mammoth-like elephant sinking into swampy lagoon surrounded by trees and shrubs. Caption reads WHAT IS THE MAGOOPSIE?
July 22, 2025 at 2:09 AM
nolanvancey.bsky.social
"THE MAGOOPSIE" in plain white text with a word bubble pointing to the quoted post: "thinking about luscious young moms today"
July 16, 2025 at 1:41 AM
nolanvancey.bsky.social
#currentlyreading SHIELD'S LADY by Jayne Ann Krentz, the third of her "Lost Colony" romances. About halfway through. #romance #books
Cover of SHIELD'S LADY by Jayne Ann Krentz, mostly white with a golden shield or badge bearing a stylized woman's face in the center.
July 7, 2025 at 2:49 AM
nolanvancey.bsky.social
"Do long black boots, polished until they shine like mirrors, their surface cool to the eye but warm to the touch, their tall heels as sharp as daggers, ready to stab you in the heart, make women cruel?"
Vintage illustration of a woman in early 1900s dress riding a bicycle over another woman who has crashed her own bicycle. The woman on the bicycle looks straight ahead, ignoring the pleas of the woman on the ground whose legs she is riding over. Caption reads "Does the bicycle make women cruel?"
July 2, 2025 at 11:29 PM
nolanvancey.bsky.social
I didn't know it was #InternationalMudDay! The muddiest story I have on my Patreon is "Gooey Games," in which the Eta Pi girls face off against a rival sorority in tug-of-war (with a little supernatural assistance!). These excerpts are from their practice session:
www.patreon.com/posts/116618...
Finally, it was time to face off. Kerry took her place at the edge of the mud patch and gripped the rope, her teammates behind her. She planted her feet in the soft earth, which crept up and smudged the toes of her white sneakers. That’s as far as it goes, she told herself with grim resolve. Across the mud, on the other end of the rope, six of her sorority sisters planted themselves, just as determined. Ducks was in front, looking disgusted—whether at the mud, or the prospect of being drafted for this exercise, or simply being dressed in a mod two-piece swimsuit against her will, Kerry couldn’t tell. The six smaller girls stumbled forward, so surprised that they didn’t even let go of the rope as it became clear that they had lost. Ducks fell face-first in the thick mud with a wet splash, that indignity compounded by Cathy Yager and Millicent J. tripping over her and pushing her in deeper before they, too, splashed into the pit. None of the six escaped at least some splattering, and poor Ducks, once they let her up, looked as if she had gone swimming in it. Even the bleached white stripe in her dark hair was covered in thick ooze. Splash! It was over. Mondy sat up, wiping her face and stoically ignoring the laughter and cheers of the others. Nearly every part of her except her bottom and back was coated in slick, glistening clay. Kerry dropped her end of the rope, hopeful that practice was over. “Not bad!” Jennifer J. said, putting an arm around her shoulder. “I wish I could say the same for the rest of the team.” The president blew the whistle again and addressed the mud-covered girls who had been left standing around. “Listen up! I want to start over with teams of four so you can all learn from Cattrall here—and from Nixon’s mistakes.”
June 29, 2025 at 6:28 PM
nolanvancey.bsky.social
Mood board/plot hints for my latest, in which Hymenea's plan to disguise herself as a fairy immediately runs into messy and perilous snags:
www.patreon.com/posts/131112...
Four panel collage: Tinkerbell from Peter Pan; a cartoon spider; Tinkerbell and her fairy friends from the newer Tinkerbell movies; an Archie-style comic book character singing the praises of Hostess Fruit Pies' delicious filling. Text reads "Hymenea's Very Small Adventure @ Patreon.com/NolanVancey"
June 11, 2025 at 11:50 AM
nolanvancey.bsky.social
Haven't been great about my #currentlyreading updates. I'm about a third of the way through CRYSTAL FLAME by Jayne Ann Krentz. I'm enjoying it, but it's the second book in a trilogy following SWEET STARFIRE and so far I have yet to see a connection. #romance #scifi #books
Cover of Crystal Flame by Jayne Ann Krentz. A shirtless man and a hawk-like bird bathed in orange and red flames
June 6, 2025 at 2:45 PM
nolanvancey.bsky.social
A little taste of Part Two:
#wam #messy #wetandmessy #kink #spicy #fantasy #waminthesky
Excerpt from "Gary Splotter and the Ridiculous Recap" Part Two: She had asked for this, Bubastis realized as she gathered her wits. To infuriate Venerea, she had promised to make love to Herman in front of her Slipperin rival. But that had been safe, inoffensive Herman, who would follow her lead until she tired of him—or so she had thought. Obviously, he had ideas of his own, and it was clear from his strong embrace and voracious kisses, from the insistent bulge that pressed against her thigh, that he would not be denied. “And you want to take—” she breathed, already knowing the answer. “You,” he growled. Leaning to caress her neck with his lips, he put his hands around her hips until they met at her lower back. With the sudden violence of a trap sprung, he tore the stained skirt from the waistband to the hem, surprising Bubastis with a blast of cold air to her exposed bottom. She yelped with shock, finding herself jumping into his waiting arms.
June 5, 2025 at 1:00 AM
nolanvancey.bsky.social
How your email finds me
Coraline's dad at the computer with baggy eyes
June 4, 2025 at 3:13 AM
nolanvancey.bsky.social
Oh, that's fair. Some of the art was very Frazetta/Vallejo-styled, but not all of it. Another example:
Cover art from one of the Dragonlance novels featuring three characters in full armor against a snowy, mountainous background with a blue dragon behind them
June 1, 2025 at 1:12 PM
nolanvancey.bsky.social
Maybe check out old school Dungeons & Dragons or Dragon magazine? By the mid-'80s the art quality was as good as what you'd see on mainstream fantasy novels with lots of full body and action poses, etc.
A sample cover for Advanced Dungeons & Dragons Book of Artifacts: a man and woman looking on in awe as a glowing orb emerges from the ground in a clutching hand
June 1, 2025 at 12:48 PM