@lillysnowy.bsky.social
For anyone who is struggling with this, I see you. You can do this, it's scary but they're not going to change. They aren't the person you fell for anymore and given the chance they will abuse, attack, and kill. Please don't wait until you end up dead, it can happen to you. I believe in you.
November 23, 2025 at 10:01 PM
For anyone who is struggling with this, I see you. You can do this, it's scary but they're not going to change. They aren't the person you fell for anymore and given the chance they will abuse, attack, and kill. Please don't wait until you end up dead, it can happen to you. I believe in you.
It's been awhile hasn't it? Tomorrow's my mother's birthday, she would have been 50 years old. Domestic violence can often times by relatives be ignored. Please if you know someone that is going through it to know you care. It's common for the victims to hide or be isolated.
November 23, 2025 at 9:58 PM
It's been awhile hasn't it? Tomorrow's my mother's birthday, she would have been 50 years old. Domestic violence can often times by relatives be ignored. Please if you know someone that is going through it to know you care. It's common for the victims to hide or be isolated.
Everytime I try to learn something it seems like life is a constant changing of balance. Every class I've taken was always wrong in another's eyes. Every juggle I never seem to get quite right they'd tell me. I don't think I'm good at juggling life, but I think one day it'll be enough I'll be enough
August 30, 2025 at 2:45 AM
Everytime I try to learn something it seems like life is a constant changing of balance. Every class I've taken was always wrong in another's eyes. Every juggle I never seem to get quite right they'd tell me. I don't think I'm good at juggling life, but I think one day it'll be enough I'll be enough
I don't think a human should bear this type of weight alone, I've tried so hard to connect with people but I've never been enough. I've been called many horrible things when my mother died. I remember my most recent therapist looking alarmed that I had no idea I was autistic. As if it was obvious.
August 30, 2025 at 2:39 AM
I don't think a human should bear this type of weight alone, I've tried so hard to connect with people but I've never been enough. I've been called many horrible things when my mother died. I remember my most recent therapist looking alarmed that I had no idea I was autistic. As if it was obvious.
Sometimes I feel like I wasn't meant to be here, the world has always been so loud, bright and painful. It feels like I'm encased in glass walls, I try so hard to connect and yet it remains unshattered. My blood, sweat and tears never go through to the other side. It's hard to read their faces.
August 30, 2025 at 2:34 AM
Sometimes I feel like I wasn't meant to be here, the world has always been so loud, bright and painful. It feels like I'm encased in glass walls, I try so hard to connect and yet it remains unshattered. My blood, sweat and tears never go through to the other side. It's hard to read their faces.
Today I've been thinking about how little family I have left. My great grandmother will leave this world soon, she has watched her daughter and granddaughter die before her. She had been lied to by my grandfather. Now I must carry her soon too, I feel so tired and so lost. I will soon lose again.
August 30, 2025 at 2:30 AM
Today I've been thinking about how little family I have left. My great grandmother will leave this world soon, she has watched her daughter and granddaughter die before her. She had been lied to by my grandfather. Now I must carry her soon too, I feel so tired and so lost. I will soon lose again.
When I was young we used to canoe a ton. We'd get water lillies to put in my grandmother's garden. I always love the flower for its strength even when it was cutoff it kept going. My mother used to love chayote.You can eat it raw, boiled or grilled. Though it's as bland as squash.
August 23, 2025 at 7:56 PM
When I was young we used to canoe a ton. We'd get water lillies to put in my grandmother's garden. I always love the flower for its strength even when it was cutoff it kept going. My mother used to love chayote.You can eat it raw, boiled or grilled. Though it's as bland as squash.
I have this family cookbook my mother loved, it was what I grew up with. I can't bear to cook without her, now nothing I make turns out right. It's still filled with crumbs and dough finger prints.I grew up cooking with her. Her favorite flowers are chrysanthemums. She had blood lillies everywhere.
August 23, 2025 at 7:50 PM
I have this family cookbook my mother loved, it was what I grew up with. I can't bear to cook without her, now nothing I make turns out right. It's still filled with crumbs and dough finger prints.I grew up cooking with her. Her favorite flowers are chrysanthemums. She had blood lillies everywhere.
My birthday was last month I don't feel like I'm 22. 5 years since she died, I never got to say goodbye because of covid. My family sided with my abuser, it was isolating being that alone at 18 especially being the last victim alive. I protected my brother from it. I will carry this pain alone.
August 23, 2025 at 7:44 PM
My birthday was last month I don't feel like I'm 22. 5 years since she died, I never got to say goodbye because of covid. My family sided with my abuser, it was isolating being that alone at 18 especially being the last victim alive. I protected my brother from it. I will carry this pain alone.
So Happy Mothers day. If I feel like I'm in agony I'll keep talking my head off about her stories. It helps ease the pain and makes this day less painful. I want to celebrate who she was as I don't want this to be just a death reminder. This is her day to shine, love you beyond death mom.
May 11, 2025 at 4:43 PM
So Happy Mothers day. If I feel like I'm in agony I'll keep talking my head off about her stories. It helps ease the pain and makes this day less painful. I want to celebrate who she was as I don't want this to be just a death reminder. This is her day to shine, love you beyond death mom.
On a cruise we crane machined 30 tiny rubber ducks. In the late of night we rubber ducked her mother's bathroom, it was glorious. My grandmother had a laughing fit, thank you James for giving my mother the rubber duck idea. She took full credit until she confessed it wasn't her creation. Duck felony
May 11, 2025 at 4:36 PM
On a cruise we crane machined 30 tiny rubber ducks. In the late of night we rubber ducked her mother's bathroom, it was glorious. My grandmother had a laughing fit, thank you James for giving my mother the rubber duck idea. She took full credit until she confessed it wasn't her creation. Duck felony
So when I found my mother lifeless she was sent to the hospital with the police called. Hilariously enough the police jumped terrified at the skeleton. I couldn't help but laugh as I showed them the plastic anatomy skeleton. My mother's silly scale was beyond death. Rubber ducks and all.
May 11, 2025 at 4:33 PM
So when I found my mother lifeless she was sent to the hospital with the police called. Hilariously enough the police jumped terrified at the skeleton. I couldn't help but laugh as I showed them the plastic anatomy skeleton. My mother's silly scale was beyond death. Rubber ducks and all.
She was THE homeschooling teacher. Color coded binder with antisocial kids and everything. I remember having to read more than 80% of animal farm, my brother was just not for it. Hearing her go through the denial phase on unschooling was silly. Even got an anatomy plastic skeleton. It was funny.
May 11, 2025 at 4:29 PM
She was THE homeschooling teacher. Color coded binder with antisocial kids and everything. I remember having to read more than 80% of animal farm, my brother was just not for it. Hearing her go through the denial phase on unschooling was silly. Even got an anatomy plastic skeleton. It was funny.
My mother used to love making necklaces and bracelets. I still have the ones she made for me as a kid. It's hard raising a weird tomboy daughter, I still hate beads. I used to drive her car in a church parking lot, she screamed a lot. I could only imagine the visceral horror my brother caused.
May 11, 2025 at 4:25 PM
My mother used to love making necklaces and bracelets. I still have the ones she made for me as a kid. It's hard raising a weird tomboy daughter, I still hate beads. I used to drive her car in a church parking lot, she screamed a lot. I could only imagine the visceral horror my brother caused.
Don't even get me started on food. She was a genius at getting broccoli in brownies, not so much with bananas in muffins. My mother is filled with flaws and vegetable filled gaslit baked goodies. Whenever we went to Kohls it was a war of attrition and we'd laugh at horrible designs and holes.
May 11, 2025 at 4:19 PM
Don't even get me started on food. She was a genius at getting broccoli in brownies, not so much with bananas in muffins. My mother is filled with flaws and vegetable filled gaslit baked goodies. Whenever we went to Kohls it was a war of attrition and we'd laugh at horrible designs and holes.
My mother had this sneaky strategic to make any shirt I overwore into a pillow. She really hated my orange and red printed truck shirt and pillowified it. I agree with her now it was justified. One time she confessed she lied to us that we were allergic to cats and dogs. It was smart but didn't last
May 11, 2025 at 4:14 PM
My mother had this sneaky strategic to make any shirt I overwore into a pillow. She really hated my orange and red printed truck shirt and pillowified it. I agree with her now it was justified. One time she confessed she lied to us that we were allergic to cats and dogs. It was smart but didn't last
We used to paint rocks together to hide in our park, sometimes we'd get rocks from around the world. It was a whole thing, even while traveling. We watched Gilmore girls and the simpsons on repeat, even had a cat named lorelei. She had a deathly fear of see through bridges, but she wobbled on! Silly
May 11, 2025 at 4:11 PM
We used to paint rocks together to hide in our park, sometimes we'd get rocks from around the world. It was a whole thing, even while traveling. We watched Gilmore girls and the simpsons on repeat, even had a cat named lorelei. She had a deathly fear of see through bridges, but she wobbled on! Silly
My mother knew how to whistle and snap her fingers. I'm still learning how. I want to be able to whistle like her one day. My mother used to work at a cookie bakery, her frosting handwriting was unmatched and precise. I remember pranking my family with her on April fools. We were spoon fiends.
May 11, 2025 at 4:07 PM
My mother knew how to whistle and snap her fingers. I'm still learning how. I want to be able to whistle like her one day. My mother used to work at a cookie bakery, her frosting handwriting was unmatched and precise. I remember pranking my family with her on April fools. We were spoon fiends.
The shirt she gave me with flowers I still wear. I'm noticing the holes in it and I couldn't care less, I'd even teach myself to stitch to keep it. I'm scared to throw anything she gave me to the point where its silly. She was a really great roller skater and water skier, was even on newspaper once.
May 11, 2025 at 4:01 PM
The shirt she gave me with flowers I still wear. I'm noticing the holes in it and I couldn't care less, I'd even teach myself to stitch to keep it. I'm scared to throw anything she gave me to the point where its silly. She was a really great roller skater and water skier, was even on newspaper once.
When I went through spinal fusion surgery, she was there every step of the way. I wish I could remember it. I have a video of her laughing at a random horse she found. No idea why lol, I'd be sobbing if I watched it rn. She was the most expressive person you'd ever meet,she was a amazing sopranoist
May 11, 2025 at 3:56 PM
When I went through spinal fusion surgery, she was there every step of the way. I wish I could remember it. I have a video of her laughing at a random horse she found. No idea why lol, I'd be sobbing if I watched it rn. She was the most expressive person you'd ever meet,she was a amazing sopranoist
Her middle name was a corny pun on de niece. She used to crochet tiny hearts, I still have mine and cry everytime I see it. When I was studying for my GED. I found a note in her writing: "Brain full, Goodnight. Love you, mom." It was when we tried to learn American sign language. I giggled seeing it
May 11, 2025 at 3:50 PM
Her middle name was a corny pun on de niece. She used to crochet tiny hearts, I still have mine and cry everytime I see it. When I was studying for my GED. I found a note in her writing: "Brain full, Goodnight. Love you, mom." It was when we tried to learn American sign language. I giggled seeing it
She'd always play clarinet in her closet even if she wasn't rusty. She loved baking, it took her years to learn the family chocolate pie recipe. We used to make recipes together, she made food even a picky eater would enjoy. Her cookbook is covered in bits of batter. She was a pro at billiards.
May 11, 2025 at 3:45 PM
She'd always play clarinet in her closet even if she wasn't rusty. She loved baking, it took her years to learn the family chocolate pie recipe. We used to make recipes together, she made food even a picky eater would enjoy. Her cookbook is covered in bits of batter. She was a pro at billiards.
She swore up and down pineapple pizza was by far the best. She loved walks at night looking for frogs. Would talk about turtles always. She loved chrysanthemums, had a long nutcracker lineup of every edition you'd never find. Antidiagnosis on every concept. Advocated for women's rights and LGBTQ+.
May 11, 2025 at 3:40 PM
She swore up and down pineapple pizza was by far the best. She loved walks at night looking for frogs. Would talk about turtles always. She loved chrysanthemums, had a long nutcracker lineup of every edition you'd never find. Antidiagnosis on every concept. Advocated for women's rights and LGBTQ+.
My mother used to play the clarinet, loved French music to death and ate escargot. She traveled around the world scraping by. She had the loudest laugh and biggest smile. She called herself a tank, her strength was math. She's one of the strongest people I know. She was someone extraordinary.
May 11, 2025 at 3:32 PM
My mother used to play the clarinet, loved French music to death and ate escargot. She traveled around the world scraping by. She had the loudest laugh and biggest smile. She called herself a tank, her strength was math. She's one of the strongest people I know. She was someone extraordinary.
It's mothers day. Christmas, holidays such as these are the slowest and most painful. I miss hearing her laugh, every hour that passes is filled with tears and agony. I remember hugging her as she cried bruised by my father in my arms. I found her lifeless body. I'm tearing at the seams. I'm sorry.
May 11, 2025 at 3:27 PM
It's mothers day. Christmas, holidays such as these are the slowest and most painful. I miss hearing her laugh, every hour that passes is filled with tears and agony. I remember hugging her as she cried bruised by my father in my arms. I found her lifeless body. I'm tearing at the seams. I'm sorry.