Jimmy (no longer a dad in training) 🧔♂️✅
@jamescoyne.bsky.social
An educated fool with bacon on my mind.
Pinned
Jokes on you; I've got more internalised hate than you'll ever hate me as a person or concept for all of eternity.
December 2, 2025 at 4:20 AM
Jokes on you; I've got more internalised hate than you'll ever hate me as a person or concept for all of eternity.
All the things she said // running through my head // running through my head // running through my head
(Forgot what my wife said to me)
(Forgot what my wife said to me)
December 1, 2025 at 7:58 AM
All the things she said // running through my head // running through my head // running through my head
(Forgot what my wife said to me)
(Forgot what my wife said to me)
"They grow up so fast 🥹"
[Talking to the moldy veg in my fridge]
[Talking to the moldy veg in my fridge]
December 1, 2025 at 1:34 AM
"They grow up so fast 🥹"
[Talking to the moldy veg in my fridge]
[Talking to the moldy veg in my fridge]
You've heard of AI Slop but if you see it for a second time, does it become AI Sloppy Seconds
November 30, 2025 at 10:56 PM
You've heard of AI Slop but if you see it for a second time, does it become AI Sloppy Seconds
Idea for an educational comedy skit for kids:
Stranger Danger Things
Stranger Danger Things
November 30, 2025 at 7:48 AM
Idea for an educational comedy skit for kids:
Stranger Danger Things
Stranger Danger Things
She's just like me 🥹
November 30, 2025 at 3:06 AM
She's just like me 🥹
Woke up feeling "normal" today, which is odd cause the new "normal" is a terrible feeling of impending doom
November 29, 2025 at 9:41 PM
Woke up feeling "normal" today, which is odd cause the new "normal" is a terrible feeling of impending doom
I went to the Capybara Cafe and disappointed I didn't get to see at least one Glen Powell
November 29, 2025 at 10:10 AM
I went to the Capybara Cafe and disappointed I didn't get to see at least one Glen Powell
Took my son to his very first Dragon Hot Pot
November 29, 2025 at 6:05 AM
Took my son to his very first Dragon Hot Pot
Cleaning the shower can take 30 minutes or all day, there's no in between.
November 28, 2025 at 11:53 PM
Cleaning the shower can take 30 minutes or all day, there's no in between.
The happiest part of my day is getting into bed at the end of the day.
November 27, 2025 at 10:10 AM
The happiest part of my day is getting into bed at the end of the day.
A "fidge cigarette" is so much more apt than a "full fat coke".
Millennials aren't always right.
Millennials aren't always right.
November 27, 2025 at 9:34 AM
A "fidge cigarette" is so much more apt than a "full fat coke".
Millennials aren't always right.
Millennials aren't always right.
Me trying to make friends with some sheep:
"NOTHING BLEATS A JET2 HOLIDAY"
"NOTHING BLEATS A JET2 HOLIDAY"
November 25, 2025 at 8:55 PM
Me trying to make friends with some sheep:
"NOTHING BLEATS A JET2 HOLIDAY"
"NOTHING BLEATS A JET2 HOLIDAY"
You met me at a very "big rice" time of my life
Wife is laughing at me for referring to generic rice companies as "big rice"
November 25, 2025 at 7:56 PM
You met me at a very "big rice" time of my life
You met me at a very "hope this email finds you well!!!" time of my life.
November 25, 2025 at 7:25 PM
You met me at a very "hope this email finds you well!!!" time of my life.
Wife is laughing at me for referring to generic rice companies as "big rice"
November 25, 2025 at 7:22 AM
Wife is laughing at me for referring to generic rice companies as "big rice"
This but with pokemon
November 24, 2025 at 11:41 PM
This but with pokemon
Wanking. It's going to be wanking, isn't it.
November 24, 2025 at 9:19 AM
Wanking. It's going to be wanking, isn't it.
[trying to muster up school drama classes]
"Yeah, like, Dua Lipa isn't even that hot"
"Yeah, like, Dua Lipa isn't even that hot"
November 24, 2025 at 6:50 AM
[trying to muster up school drama classes]
"Yeah, like, Dua Lipa isn't even that hot"
"Yeah, like, Dua Lipa isn't even that hot"
The best thing about having a kid is the sudden urge to then have another one
November 24, 2025 at 5:24 AM
The best thing about having a kid is the sudden urge to then have another one
"getting to bed at 7:30pm" level of exhausted
November 22, 2025 at 8:35 AM
"getting to bed at 7:30pm" level of exhausted
I hope this email finds your smell
November 20, 2025 at 3:40 PM
I hope this email finds your smell