Eli Evans
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elievans.art
Eli Evans
@elievans.art
760 followers 970 following 1.7K posts
Sci-fi & fantasy author, software designer, composer/beatmaker, erstwhile hornist. Indie all the way. Recent widower. This is my real name and face. State the reason for your DM. No paid reviews. he/him

https://elievans.art
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Post something random or you’ll have an awful December.
Photo of a rack of meat thermometers at Walmart. I took this to ask my daughter which one she wanted me to buy.
November 28, 2025 at 12:05 AM
elievans.art
Post your warning label. This is mine:
Calvin and Hobbes cartoon by Bill Watterson, four panels. Panel 1: Calvin is speaking to Hobbes, “The more you know, the harder it is to take decisive action.” Panel 2, he continues, “Once you become informed, you start seeing complexities and shades of gray.” Panel 3, zoom in on Calvin, he’s really passionate now, “You realize that nothing is as clear and simple as it first appears. Ultimately, knowledge is paralyzing.” Panel 4, back to the wide shot. Calvin is tossing a schoolbook over his shoulder. “Being a man of action, I can’t afford to take that risk,” he says. Hobbes rolls his eyes and replies, “You’re ignorant, but at least you act on it.”
November 25, 2025 at 11:21 PM
elievans.art
Introduce yourself with 4 spaceships.
Nell from Battle Beyond the Stars. The Argo (aka Space Battleship Yamato) from Star Blazers. USS Reliant (NCC-1864) from Star Trek II: Wrath of Khan. The Tilt-a-Whirl from Explorers (1985)
November 25, 2025 at 8:27 AM
elievans.art
You will be visited by three spirits.

The three spirits.
The Wonder Twins, Zan and Jayna, and Gleek the monkey. Form of … the Mammoth of Christmas Past! Shape of … the Ice Ladder of Christmas Present! *Gleek mumbles incoherently.*
November 25, 2025 at 5:05 AM
elievans.art
For background, aphantasics are people who can't conjure images just by thinking, like me. Google “aphantasia” for more detail. On the 1-5 scale in the attached image, I'm about a 4.5. 🔻

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Aphanta...
Aphantasia scale from 1 to 5. Five silhouette heads looking left, in a row. The first one contains a detailed 3d image of an apple. The second, an artistic rendering. The third, a desaturated low detail image. The fourth, a chalk outline. The fifth, nothing.
November 24, 2025 at 6:15 PM
elievans.art
Tryna eat more healthy. (It’s pretty tasty, too.)
Photo of a plate of salad: power greens and roasted red bell pepper, grated carrot, scallion, cucumber, two hard boiled eggs, and a yoghurt based dressing.
November 14, 2025 at 2:59 AM
elievans.art
Meme image. “Probable, yo! The odds is probable!” A still from one of my favorite SNL skits of all time, “Hip Hop Kidz: Word! We Are Straight Up Trapped in a Bear Cave, Yo”. Four comics, two male, two female, dressed in gaudy, stereotypically 90s “urban” athleisure wear are standing and debating the probability that the baby bear cub they just found in the bear cave has a mother nearby. Zig Zag (Andy Samberg), the voice of reason in this group of otherwise very sincere but dopey teenagers, declares that the odds “is probable, yo.” Other players in the shot: Abby Elliott as Lil’ Prinzess; Ryan Philippe as J Style; and Kristen Wiig as Baby Suggs.
October 22, 2025 at 8:24 PM
elievans.art
Putting the “fun” in exercising my FUNdamental right to peaceably assemble and petition the government for redress of grievances. #NoKings
October 18, 2025 at 11:15 PM
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Had a blast getting rained on at the #NoKings rally in Bellingham, WA. Yes, that’s little old boring normie liberal me inside that there bear. I was going to make an “ice” vs “I.C.E.” pun, but when I made the signs, I wasn’t sure I’d wear the inflatable.

No America hating.
A park in the rain. A political rally, loose crowd. Focus: A man in an inflatable polar bear costume holding a sign that says “NO […]KING ANY TIME.” The sign is a parody of a “no parking” sign. A park in the rain. A political rally, loose crowd. Focus: A man in an inflatable polar bear costume holding a sign that says “TIRED OF THIS MALARKEY.”
October 18, 2025 at 11:15 PM
elievans.art
Sixteen years ago, one of our first dates was a Mariners game. One of the last things we got to do together after 15 years of marriage was a Mariners game. This was us in April of this year, less than a month before the cancer took her. 2/3
Me and Olga at T-Mobile stadium in April of this year, less than a month before she passed from cancer.
October 11, 2025 at 5:32 AM
elievans.art
You can buy a print of this fun “watercolor” of a fantastic beast that is definitely not a dinosaur of any species for ~$45 on pixelsmerch. Is that a four-legged opossum with two crocodile tails for horns?? 😂
A “watercolor” of a four-legged beast that looks like an anteater or an opossum with two fat horns that look like alligator tails (no really) mixed with medieval conception and a pachyderm. Oh, it also has two tails where a tail would go, but one of them is clearly protruding from its anus.
October 10, 2025 at 5:59 AM
elievans.art
No, Etsy, no. Do not give this “parasauralophus” “poster” to any kids! (This image is the first hit under the shopping strip on Google for me right now.)
This “parasauralophus” image is from Etsy, with the crest coming to a long sharp point, almost like I don’t know, a therapod snout with absurdly large nostrils, basically the right limb proportions (basically), dragon claws on the front and hind limbs.
October 10, 2025 at 5:59 AM
elievans.art
Many of the images I saw on these sites confuse the parasauralophus with a goat or an ibex, if they feature a crest at all. Check out this zebra camel goat tapir with shoulder-knees, a detached tail, and three-toed feet — except the one with four toes, natch.
A screenshot of two AI slop images from a stock image site purporting to be parasauralophus but exhibiting features of zebras, goats, camels, other families of dinosaur, plastic toys, fantasy dragons and lord-knows-what.
October 10, 2025 at 5:37 AM
elievans.art
Stock image sites are overrun with ridiculous AI slop. Someday someone is gonna get this garbage tattooed on themselves and try to pass it off as a parasauralophus because their artist didn’t know better. #paleoart
A screenshot from the stock image website PNGTree, purportedly a stock image of a parasauralophus, but in fact a strange AI-generated dinosaur-like beast with one horn sort of attached to its head where the creature would be and one long tusk (?) growing from its upper jaw. The head looks like a T-Rex, but sad? Its posture is vaguely like a four-footed hadrosaur, but the limb and body proportions are more like a fantasy dragon, as is the tail.
October 10, 2025 at 5:37 AM
elievans.art
If you see this picture, post a random image from your device.
Photo of a specialized can opener that is for removing the tops of soda cans while leaving a smooth lid. It’s a hunk of gray plastic sitting on the gray countertop — not a very interesting photo visually. (My youngest son likes to make frozen Coke slushies, and he has grown frustrated with our “terrible” regular can opener that “doesn’t work.”) Now, it’s not entirely intuitive how this new one works, so there is a sticker on the bottom with a QR code that leads to a demonstration video. The caption on the sticker reads: “Warning! Failure to scan may lead to confusion … your future self will thank you!” I am happy to report that the video was very informative and the slushies are now coming out just fine. No fingers were cut, no swears uttered.
September 29, 2025 at 7:12 AM
elievans.art
Had a family memorial/celebration for my late wife Olga today. It was good. I have been having trouble accessing good memories — troubled by thoughts of her sick and dying — and reminiscing with her family helped wash out some of the painful memories with happy ones. (Short thread.) 🔻
A memorial display. Blue wall. Gray bookshelves, filled with games. Hanging on the wall, a circular textile, a multicolored rug. On the bookcases, at the center of the display, a vase filled with red, yellow, and white daisies and yellow sunflowers. On either side sit framed photo portrait of a smiling, beautiful middle-aged woman. She’s half-Filipino, half Native American, black straight hair, brown eyes, olive skin. She’s wearing large cat-eye glasses and a toothy grin. The photo frames are colorful, cheerful, and quirky, just like her.
August 17, 2025 at 3:36 AM
elievans.art
This is where I post from.
Scene from the 1980 sci-fi cheeseball classic known as “Battle Beyond the Stars.” Nestor is a group consciousness of five humanoid alien beings. They have paper white skin, white tunics, and are standing around a central control column in their ship’s control room, which is a featureless white room. All five members of Nestor are pointing to a third eye painted on their foreheads, their thinking pose.
July 19, 2025 at 4:26 AM
elievans.art
Finally updated my workstation to integrate the piano and a couple of other tweaks. The chair is a barstool with a low back and four legs. Do not get me started on office chairs.
A photo of my workstation. A pink book with shelves. In the nook is a sit/stand desk with a hand crank to adjust it up and down. The desk has a Yamaha full size piano keyboard and on top of that, a 27” Apple monitor and a laptop to the right, and a Blue Yeti microphone on the left. Several pairs of headphones. The chair is a gray barstool with a low back. The floor is checkerboard black and white tile. Other items o ln the shelf are photos of me and my late wife, and copies of my novel. On the desk is an Apple magic mouse and “chiclet” keyboard. Also there: A small plastic lizard who has been on all my workstations for 25 years, and a plastic “flaming dumpster” toy I bought in 2020.
July 14, 2025 at 9:53 PM
elievans.art
40 plus appreciation post! Reskeet with a pic if you’re on the right side of 40.

51 over here
A selfie of me. I’m a 51 year old white guy with a buzz cut and an egg-shaped face. I wear black plastic glasses, not quite horn-rimmed, and I have a white goatee and a salt and pepper mustache. I let my goatee grow as long as it will, which is about 4 or 5 inches. I’m sitting in my car wearing a red coat. My expression is neutral.
June 23, 2025 at 4:17 AM
elievans.art
I went to the Mariners game on Sunday. I thought it might be triggering because my late wife had bought us the tickets. But I was overwhelmed with gratitude for all the things she brought into my life. Baseball, for one. Her kids, for another. And of course herself, for as long as she could.
Selfie. Me, big fat guy with glasses and a white beard. One of my daughters, tiny and wearing glasses and a ball cap. Her boyfriend, long brown hair and a goatee. We’re sitting in the stadium at T-mobile park, all smiling for the camera. Selfie of me and my lovely late wife at T-mobile park, sitting in the stands. I’m a big guy with glasses and a fuzzy white beard. Basically redneck Santa. She’s leaning on my shoulder, lovely as always, wearing a Mariners jersey and cat-eye sunglasses. Our smiles couldn’t be bigger or more genuine.
June 3, 2025 at 6:15 PM
elievans.art
“Guess I’ll die” meme. Elderly man in a red shirt looks to camera and shrugs, hands up, expression signaling there’s nothing he can do about this terrible situation. OH WELL.
May 6, 2025 at 12:37 AM
elievans.art
Meme of an old-time advertisement. 50’s style. Two schoolchildren are laughing as a third girl in the center is happily regaling them with some joke or story. Top text: “Look at me, I’m a Neurotypical!” Bottom text: “If you don’t want to talk to me on demand, you’re anti-social.”
April 27, 2025 at 5:08 PM
elievans.art
How I arrived on Bluesky.
Simpsons still. Marge driving the family car with Bart and Lisa in the back. Marge, concerned, says, “Kids, could you lighten up a little?”
April 22, 2025 at 10:25 PM
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Show me one gif from Star Trek that perfectly embodies your aura.
Mr. Spock seated and playing the Vulcan harp. Next to him, a space hippie girl plays what looks like a bicycle wheel. They are both jamming out, in their own way.
April 20, 2025 at 6:58 AM
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I never liked that Dr. Stupid.
Simpsons meme. Quote from season 11, episode 9. Ralph Wiggum, dressed as a doctor, is holding a handsaw over an effigy of Mr Burns. He says enthusiastically, “Hello, I’m Dr. Stupid. I’m going to take out your liver bones. Oops, you’re dead.”
April 3, 2025 at 8:24 PM