im the she.e.o. of my own destiny
November 12, 2025 at 6:30 AM
im the she.e.o. of my own destiny
Reposted by mammon
Guys I don’t care about the fuckass sky my concerns are terrestrial and immediate
November 12, 2025 at 4:36 AM
Guys I don’t care about the fuckass sky my concerns are terrestrial and immediate
i'm flying all you guys out for christmas
November 12, 2025 at 4:49 AM
i'm flying all you guys out for christmas
i'm putting my hands on my hips about this. but only for a minute cuz it looks silly!!!
November 12, 2025 at 2:22 AM
i'm putting my hands on my hips about this. but only for a minute cuz it looks silly!!!
almost gave up on this one and i'm glad i didn't
November 12, 2025 at 1:10 AM
almost gave up on this one and i'm glad i didn't
Reposted by mammon
Reposted by mammon
what did mommy say about bothering her while she's in the life size recreation of the grassy knoll in the basement sweetie.
November 11, 2025 at 6:09 PM
what did mommy say about bothering her while she's in the life size recreation of the grassy knoll in the basement sweetie.
your great great great great grandparents were born in 7000 BCE roughly
November 11, 2025 at 1:39 PM
your great great great great grandparents were born in 7000 BCE roughly
none of us have really been around that long
November 11, 2025 at 1:34 PM
none of us have really been around that long
i was never on debate team. im a pacifist
November 11, 2025 at 6:25 AM
i was never on debate team. im a pacifist
we all have that one homie that went to jared
November 11, 2025 at 6:20 AM
we all have that one homie that went to jared
i found a little piece of skin that won't come off
November 11, 2025 at 5:18 AM
i found a little piece of skin that won't come off
Reposted by mammon
im headed to the basket if anyone wants to pass me the rock
November 11, 2025 at 4:23 AM
im headed to the basket if anyone wants to pass me the rock
Reposted by mammon
Sure, it's called a waffle iron, but the waffles don't come out all smooth.
November 11, 2025 at 4:35 AM
Sure, it's called a waffle iron, but the waffles don't come out all smooth.
thirty seconds after i hit tweet you better believe i'm wondering why no one has liked my tweet. every time
November 11, 2025 at 4:58 AM
thirty seconds after i hit tweet you better believe i'm wondering why no one has liked my tweet. every time
i open the door to let our big dog out of the bedroom every night and it always feels like i'm sending him to camp. sometimes he looks back at me and i give him a little wave
November 11, 2025 at 4:56 AM
i open the door to let our big dog out of the bedroom every night and it always feels like i'm sending him to camp. sometimes he looks back at me and i give him a little wave
Reposted by mammon
when i haven't been tweeting stuff you guys should go back and like all my old tweets so i can get a lot of notifications without doing any work
November 11, 2025 at 2:14 AM
when i haven't been tweeting stuff you guys should go back and like all my old tweets so i can get a lot of notifications without doing any work
Reposted by mammon
do you guys want to come to my house and stand up until we get tired and then we can sit down
November 10, 2025 at 11:14 PM
do you guys want to come to my house and stand up until we get tired and then we can sit down
me and tuna salad are working it out
November 10, 2025 at 9:40 PM
me and tuna salad are working it out
every country should have a sandwich maker laureate
November 10, 2025 at 8:18 PM
every country should have a sandwich maker laureate
cheap things should be nice and expensive things should be free, capiche?
November 10, 2025 at 8:11 PM
cheap things should be nice and expensive things should be free, capiche?
i was really into product design as an undergrad and had my eyes set on this big deal ycombo feeder 'makerspace' type graduate program at stanford, but then i learned the guys who started juul had gone through that program and all my interest in that career immediately collapsed (thank goodness)
humbly proposing that vape pens are quietly one of the most evil inventions in the past 25 years and that everyone involved should be tried at the hague
November 10, 2025 at 7:10 PM
i was really into product design as an undergrad and had my eyes set on this big deal ycombo feeder 'makerspace' type graduate program at stanford, but then i learned the guys who started juul had gone through that program and all my interest in that career immediately collapsed (thank goodness)