Mommy Shortbread🎁
@coolhandkas.bsky.social
she/her
Join Posts.docx, the nothing app
https://docs.google.com/document/d/1l704FtF-7_OQSKiFrw_GIPwMwLtoGvAu/edit?usp=drivesdk&ouid=111211770282405088388&rtpof=true&sd=true
Join Posts.docx, the nothing app
https://docs.google.com/document/d/1l704FtF-7_OQSKiFrw_GIPwMwLtoGvAu/edit?usp=drivesdk&ouid=111211770282405088388&rtpof=true&sd=true
Pinned
Had a guy ask me for a reprint of a receipt he lost, he goes "it's for Caterpillar pants" I go "dang those pants must have a ton of legs" he didn't laugh. I laughed a lot. That's showbiz baby
when you can't use your comforter at bedtime because it's still in the laundry and will take at least another hour, call that a too late can't wait duvet
December 9, 2025 at 6:47 AM
when you can't use your comforter at bedtime because it's still in the laundry and will take at least another hour, call that a too late can't wait duvet
Reposted by Mommy Shortbread🎁
“why is the us government posting racist franklin the turtle memes?” I dunno man, hadn’t noticed. seems like you’d have to go out of your way to see that kind of thing. did you know you can look at pornography online
December 8, 2025 at 2:03 AM
“why is the us government posting racist franklin the turtle memes?” I dunno man, hadn’t noticed. seems like you’d have to go out of your way to see that kind of thing. did you know you can look at pornography online
Reposted by Mommy Shortbread🎁
Not now kitten, daddy is helping hamburger
December 8, 2025 at 9:14 PM
Not now kitten, daddy is helping hamburger
baklava day 😍 I do not feel like leaving the house or spending money so I'll be using macadamias and pecans instead of pistachios, wish me luck
Holiday baking begins TODAY baby
December 8, 2025 at 9:16 PM
baklava day 😍 I do not feel like leaving the house or spending money so I'll be using macadamias and pecans instead of pistachios, wish me luck
brought a whole assortment yesterday for my reading club meeting and it went over VERY well, which made my heart happy because not only was it the first meeting I've hosted but also my bitch manager made a comment beforehand about how I should have gone with more exciting snacks 🙄
Holiday baking begins TODAY baby
December 8, 2025 at 8:36 PM
brought a whole assortment yesterday for my reading club meeting and it went over VERY well, which made my heart happy because not only was it the first meeting I've hosted but also my bitch manager made a comment beforehand about how I should have gone with more exciting snacks 🙄
Reposted by Mommy Shortbread🎁
I can no longer send "tips" to the FBI because they figured out I was just tricking them into listening to my demo tape
November 30, 2025 at 11:10 PM
I can no longer send "tips" to the FBI because they figured out I was just tricking them into listening to my demo tape
Like five years ago my sister in law taught me that chiropractors are evil fake doctors to be avoided at all costs, this fact has been the backbone of my identity (pun intended obviously) ever since
December 8, 2025 at 8:12 PM
Like five years ago my sister in law taught me that chiropractors are evil fake doctors to be avoided at all costs, this fact has been the backbone of my identity (pun intended obviously) ever since
Reposted by Mommy Shortbread🎁
our current prime minister sucks so fuckin muuuuuuch
the former one sucked too. but at least he was hot
the former one sucked too. but at least he was hot
December 7, 2025 at 6:31 AM
our current prime minister sucks so fuckin muuuuuuch
the former one sucked too. but at least he was hot
the former one sucked too. but at least he was hot
Reposted by Mommy Shortbread🎁
go ahead. post another "take." tell me that hating LLMs is ableist. say anne frank had white privilege. accuse a big account of not following enough people back. come up with a woke way to say pedophiles are not bad. call me a russian bot for not liking the pope.
December 8, 2025 at 5:02 PM
go ahead. post another "take." tell me that hating LLMs is ableist. say anne frank had white privilege. accuse a big account of not following enough people back. come up with a woke way to say pedophiles are not bad. call me a russian bot for not liking the pope.
If you have one hidden reply on your post it's probably from an asshole. If you have a ton of hidden replies on your post then you are definitely the asshole
December 8, 2025 at 5:27 AM
If you have one hidden reply on your post it's probably from an asshole. If you have a ton of hidden replies on your post then you are definitely the asshole
"HAMBURGER HELPER IS JUST THE NAME OF THE NOODLES AND SEASONING INGREDIENTS, SO THE ACTUAL DISH ITSELF WOULD BE CALLED HELPED HAMBURGER OR HAMBURGER WHICH HAS BEEN HELPED"
December 8, 2025 at 1:05 AM
"HAMBURGER HELPER IS JUST THE NAME OF THE NOODLES AND SEASONING INGREDIENTS, SO THE ACTUAL DISH ITSELF WOULD BE CALLED HELPED HAMBURGER OR HAMBURGER WHICH HAS BEEN HELPED"
Reposted by Mommy Shortbread🎁
Carney’s political acumen amounts to this: he always knew he could deliver more for his constituents (the ruling class) as a Liberal than as a Conservative
Giving ministers the power to exempt pet projects from any law on the books except for the Criminal Code isn’t nation-building. It’s a disaster waiting to happen.
The fact that they‘re trying to sneak this through without any explanation is particularly incriminating.
The fact that they‘re trying to sneak this through without any explanation is particularly incriminating.
Althia Raj: Mark Carney is quietly giving sweeping new powers to his ministers
Sneaking a change of this magnitude into a 600-page bill that will not get parliamentary scrutiny raises a red flag, Althia Raj writes.
www.thestar.com
December 7, 2025 at 2:44 PM
Carney’s political acumen amounts to this: he always knew he could deliver more for his constituents (the ruling class) as a Liberal than as a Conservative
our current prime minister sucks so fuckin muuuuuuch
the former one sucked too. but at least he was hot
the former one sucked too. but at least he was hot
December 7, 2025 at 6:31 AM
our current prime minister sucks so fuckin muuuuuuch
the former one sucked too. but at least he was hot
the former one sucked too. but at least he was hot
thinking about her again 😒
December 7, 2025 at 1:49 AM
thinking about her again 😒
Reposted by Mommy Shortbread🎁
Come through we're throwing batteries in the fire
December 7, 2025 at 1:43 AM
Come through we're throwing batteries in the fire
like at the VERY least we gotta start throwing pies at politicians again. haven't seen a pie thrown at a member of the electorate in ages, that's how you know we've lost
December 7, 2025 at 1:19 AM
like at the VERY least we gotta start throwing pies at politicians again. haven't seen a pie thrown at a member of the electorate in ages, that's how you know we've lost
Once again if I said what I think I would absolutely get a time out from this website
December 7, 2025 at 1:17 AM
Once again if I said what I think I would absolutely get a time out from this website
Reposted by Mommy Shortbread🎁
I fucking love memes you can understand through the language barrier, holy shit
December 6, 2025 at 3:39 PM
I fucking love memes you can understand through the language barrier, holy shit
If this person at the break room table sniffles one more time instead of just blowing his damn nose I'm gonna throw a pudding cup at his face
December 6, 2025 at 6:23 PM
If this person at the break room table sniffles one more time instead of just blowing his damn nose I'm gonna throw a pudding cup at his face
Reposted by Mommy Shortbread🎁
how do I stop gnawing my cuticles off, do NOT tell me it's cutting back my stress level it better not be cutting back my stress level
December 6, 2025 at 6:59 AM
how do I stop gnawing my cuticles off, do NOT tell me it's cutting back my stress level it better not be cutting back my stress level
alright I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna drag my depressed ass to this stupid job today
December 6, 2025 at 2:20 PM
alright I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna drag my depressed ass to this stupid job today
Reposted by Mommy Shortbread🎁
Couldn’t Sam Altman just ask ChatGPT how to make itself profitable
December 6, 2025 at 4:38 AM
Couldn’t Sam Altman just ask ChatGPT how to make itself profitable
how do I stop gnawing my cuticles off, do NOT tell me it's cutting back my stress level it better not be cutting back my stress level
December 6, 2025 at 6:59 AM
how do I stop gnawing my cuticles off, do NOT tell me it's cutting back my stress level it better not be cutting back my stress level