Maybe I can show this to my family.

Might be interesting to gauge the reaction...

The next step is usually "sue people for not using our product."

Flashback to when I was eight or nine and found the book among my parents' mystery novels, and asking my Mom, "How do you lose an entire lake??

It's unnerving being a writer and seeing someone complain about "the writing" in something you enjoyed. You start to question your own skills.

I was so disillusioned the first time I actually read the rules of Monopoly...

I wear bifocals; insert your own joke here.

Maybe there's an unspoken "in no particular order" under the title of the article? Can't figure out why "Airplane!" is where it is otherwise.

Lived in downtown Portland at the time, near the hospital...which means we never lost power. I remember the walk to work being a bit slick, but tbat was it.

Got some pretty dramatic pictures at the editorial desk, though.

*holds up the third and final 12.5 turkey* This one roasts on Thursday. I always wanted to make Thanksgiving dinner for my parents, so this'll be a first.

Man, this thing is hard as a bowling ball...

...

Would it be tacky to name the three turkeys "Huey, Dewey, and Louie?"

At this point I'm half-convinced we're going to find mass graves.

So, I took it back to the drawing board, to see if I could write more than a reaction to a pop-cultural touchstone. I think I was too busy cackling and rubbing my hands together - "Let's see these fuckers get outta this one" - to judge it on merit, but I'll give it a little time...

The original version was pretty much just what it said on the tin - a werewolf survives the sinking of the Titanic. It was part of the Half Million anthology in 2000; I'd pretty much forgotten about it until I was going through some files this past July.

For some reason, I found it hilarious.

...feels more affordable already... :P

I dunno. I think I lost a few brain cells reading that.

I've been purging the word Alpha from my older stories one rewrite at a time, but some of them rely on a strong top-down social structure. I rationalize the remnants by indicating that they are half-human, after all, so not all behaviors and interactions are going to be based on wolves.

Producers, man...

You know, this is actually edible? I mean, it's a LITTLE bit dry. I've certainly had worse.

I'd carve it up before serving it, though. It looks like a raisin. I think people would look at it and go, "What did you do, shoot it into the sun?"