Amesower
@awesomer.bsky.social
Jerk of all trades; master of pun
Van Cortlandt House, Bronx, New York
December 8, 2025 at 10:41 PM
Van Cortlandt House, Bronx, New York
At least two of these are right by my childhood home.
December 6, 2025 at 9:31 PM
At least two of these are right by my childhood home.
How’s this for a lyric to a country song? “At my job they gave me a plaque / But the dentist scraped it away”
December 6, 2025 at 3:41 AM
How’s this for a lyric to a country song? “At my job they gave me a plaque / But the dentist scraped it away”
Reposted by Amesower
If Justin Timberlake and Andy Samberg were in Hedwig and the Angry Inch, there would have been a song called "Wig in a Box."
December 5, 2025 at 5:35 PM
If Justin Timberlake and Andy Samberg were in Hedwig and the Angry Inch, there would have been a song called "Wig in a Box."
Pearls before swine, always fine
Swine before pearls, death unfurls
Swine before pearls, death unfurls
December 4, 2025 at 1:50 AM
Pearls before swine, always fine
Swine before pearls, death unfurls
Swine before pearls, death unfurls
Do I ask myself rhetorical questions? Yes. Do I answer those questions even though they are rhetorical? Also yes.
December 3, 2025 at 9:37 PM
Do I ask myself rhetorical questions? Yes. Do I answer those questions even though they are rhetorical? Also yes.
Look, my follower count may be low, but it is... nice.
December 3, 2025 at 4:50 PM
Look, my follower count may be low, but it is... nice.
If donkey rhymed with monkey, donkey would have an u sound and monkey would have an o sound, and they still wouldn’t rhyme.
December 3, 2025 at 2:36 PM
If donkey rhymed with monkey, donkey would have an u sound and monkey would have an o sound, and they still wouldn’t rhyme.
(Stephen Malkmus saying “Geddy Lee’s voice” voice): Joe Wengert’s voice
December 1, 2025 at 2:35 AM
(Stephen Malkmus saying “Geddy Lee’s voice” voice): Joe Wengert’s voice
I don’t trust a recipe that calls for three teaspoons of something.
November 27, 2025 at 3:06 PM
I don’t trust a recipe that calls for three teaspoons of something.
If you're not for before, you're anti-ante.
November 26, 2025 at 11:26 PM
If you're not for before, you're anti-ante.
This one turned out okay.
November 26, 2025 at 3:36 AM
This one turned out okay.
What kind of cigarettes did your parents smoke? Mine smoked Benson & Hedges Menthol Lights.
November 25, 2025 at 3:58 AM
What kind of cigarettes did your parents smoke? Mine smoked Benson & Hedges Menthol Lights.
When celery stalks and carrot sticks take over the government, it’s called a cru d’etat.
November 24, 2025 at 11:12 PM
When celery stalks and carrot sticks take over the government, it’s called a cru d’etat.
Something you may not know is that in that weird Kim Cattrall scatting thing, she's quoting Rupert Brooke's 1907 poem "The Little Dog's Day."
November 24, 2025 at 3:01 AM
Something you may not know is that in that weird Kim Cattrall scatting thing, she's quoting Rupert Brooke's 1907 poem "The Little Dog's Day."
I don't have any plants.
Twitter accounts are based in Russia. BlueSky accounts are based in homes with, frankly, too many books, plants, obsolete cables, and pieces of rustic pottery, that could do with a bit of a tidying up, to be honest.
November 24, 2025 at 12:48 AM
I don't have any plants.
Nine eleven never forget lmao. You forgot ten!!
November 23, 2025 at 8:05 PM
Nine eleven never forget lmao. You forgot ten!!
There better be a dispensary in Chicago called Herbs in Horto.
November 22, 2025 at 5:38 PM
There better be a dispensary in Chicago called Herbs in Horto.
No Woman, No Crime: A Marley Mystery
November 22, 2025 at 3:01 AM
No Woman, No Crime: A Marley Mystery
A lid, a lorf, a nanny… Little Orphan Annie
November 20, 2025 at 3:10 AM
A lid, a lorf, a nanny… Little Orphan Annie
Seagull with a croissant
November 20, 2025 at 12:28 AM
Seagull with a croissant
Leonard Cohen was wrong; Jesus was a carpenter, not a sailor. He must not have been paying attention in Sunday school.
November 18, 2025 at 9:14 PM
Leonard Cohen was wrong; Jesus was a carpenter, not a sailor. He must not have been paying attention in Sunday school.
