Andrew Jordan
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ajordanxiii.bsky.social
Andrew Jordan
@ajordanxiii.bsky.social
750 followers 710 following 3.2K posts
Former creative designer, photographer. Certified master cocksman. 50% caffeine 50% awesome and 100% sarcastic. I enjoy videogames for reasons and I've been called the Temu Pedro Pascal. Sometimes a play pretend for people.
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ajordanxiii.bsky.social
I have prepped and now I look like a fucking grape and my face is fucking cold.
Some idiot selfie in black and white because the person is pretentious and self involved and also had a very odd reaction to wet shaving their own scalp. A quizzical expression is on their handsome face.
November 7, 2025 at 3:06 PM
ajordanxiii.bsky.social
A couple more because this morning was beautiful.
A close up of some moss on a wall, grass and foliage can be seen in the background. A spider web connected to a leaf hangs in the air and is glistening with the dew from a morning mist. Seed pods against a backdrop of leaves and flowers with some cobweb strands wet with dew suspended from the tendrils of the pods. Some dark green leaves wet with morning dew.
October 12, 2025 at 11:19 PM
ajordanxiii.bsky.social
The weather has been very weathery today and I'm not mad.

www.instagram.com/p/DPtKf0fjLW...
A close up of the nook of a dead cherry tree covered in spiderwebs glistening because of the dew from the mist.
October 12, 2025 at 10:33 AM
ajordanxiii.bsky.social
Bonus round from midsummer..
A purple and yellow pansy photograph set against a cloudy sky. A close up of some pebbles and grass roots in a garden, the foreground is blurry. A photograph of a pink rose near an old brick wall. A close up of some white fox gloves in a thicker if dense foliage and grass.
October 11, 2025 at 4:13 PM
ajordanxiii.bsky.social
I did an outside, it was damp and cold and worth it. 10 out of 10 exper, would recommend.
A picture of a river lily or crimson flag lily bloom, it is a soft pink with dark red veins and a lush green backdrop of leaves and grass. A picture of a river lily or crimson flag lily bloom, it is a deep almost red pink with dark red veins and an old wooden fence backdrop. A picture of a river lily or crimson flag lily bloom, it is a deep pink almost red with a soft white centre and some unopened buds set against an old wooden panel fence. A picture of a river lily or crimson flag lily bloom, it is a soft pink with dark red veins and a lush green backdrop of leaves and grass.
October 11, 2025 at 2:52 PM
ajordanxiii.bsky.social
Also here are last nights impromptu moon snaps, looks at my moon, it's big. Also the low light mode in the last image really is impressive for a digital device with tiny lenses.
A picture of the moon taken in October during the harvest supermoon. A wide shot of the moon which appears as a bright glowing sphere set against some clouds and trails from aircraft. An even wider shot of the moon which now is a small dot in the night sky and you can see a garden, some fencing and the profile of a spotting scope in the foreground. An even wider shot of the moon which now is a small dot in the night sky and you can see a garden, some fencing and the profile of a spotting scope in the foreground. This time using low light settings and the garden is now illuminated accordingly with the extra light gathered.
October 7, 2025 at 9:52 AM
ajordanxiii.bsky.social
Did garden stuff for my brain, didn't help but got dirty so it was worth it.
A close up shot of some flowers in a small flower bed. The flowers are pansies with yellow and purple petals and thick rich green leaves. A wide shot of some flowers in a small flower bed. The flowers are pansies with yellow and purple petals and thick rich green leaves.
October 2, 2025 at 5:43 PM
ajordanxiii.bsky.social
Someone sent this to me earlier and I haven't stopped chuckling about it all day, sure that could be indicative of the amount of opioids in my system but honestly I think it's just very funny.
Two stills from the 1992 Bram Stokers Dracula adaptation. The top one is of Gary Oldman as Count Dracula wearing a top hat and shades with the text "I have crossed oceans of time to find you" and the second image is Winona Ryder as Mina Harker in a bonnet and fine gown with the text "Did you cross oceans of time to rail my friend in the garden first?"
September 21, 2025 at 2:30 PM
ajordanxiii.bsky.social
Saturday
September 20, 2025 at 8:25 PM
ajordanxiii.bsky.social
I mean come on.
Ryan Gosling and Flynn Gray on the ocean filming Star Wars Starfighter.
September 17, 2025 at 7:39 PM
ajordanxiii.bsky.social
If you see this quote the energy you bring to Bluesky.
An Otter is being held by a human. Dangled into a bathtub there is a look of fear, bewilderment and shock on the animals face when anthropomorphised.
September 16, 2025 at 8:43 AM
ajordanxiii.bsky.social
If you were ever wondering what happens when Goodbye Horses comes on during shower karaoke, now you have an accurate representation.
September 14, 2025 at 4:24 PM
ajordanxiii.bsky.social
No you're a fucking nerd who made Serenity in NMS because you're a loser.
A person in a pink space suit stands on a smoking landing pad with a large space ship on it in the distance. The space ship resembles the Serenity from the TV show Firefly.
September 4, 2025 at 4:42 PM
ajordanxiii.bsky.social
So I am deep in opioids now and playing the new NMS update and it's so pretty, just so so pretty.
A spaceship can be seen flying low over a dusty desert orange planet with golden lightning crashing down from the clouds in the distance. A spaceship can be seen flying over a desolate landscape with huge blue lightning strikes illuminating the distant skies. A spaceship can be seen flying low in an orange sky with golden lightning strikes appearing through the clouds causing the mountains to silhouette in the haze and light. An astronaut can be seen free falling in a sky diver arms out pose against a blue sky with light wispy clouds in it.
September 3, 2025 at 6:41 PM
ajordanxiii.bsky.social
Seriously this is very exciting. Image from the Ubisoft social post on the hellscape.
A division agent is seen walking down a street thick with snow, a light fog in the air. In the foreground a sign can be seen indicating that the scene is in Washington DC.
August 18, 2025 at 12:23 PM
ajordanxiii.bsky.social
Grounded truly does capture the Pixar aesthetic and I think because of that cuteness it is always a shock when it makes me absolutely shit my pants with fear.
A screenshot from Grounded the game by Obsidian Entertainment. There is a young man who has been shrunk down to insect size wearing armour made up of various insect parts. He is overlooking a large body of water covered in lily pads as the sun shines. A screenshot from Grounded the game by Obsidian Entertainment. There is a young man who has been shrunk down to insect size wearing armour made up of various insect parts. He is looking out into a muddy landscape as the sun sets, huge protruding from the dirt in front of him.
August 16, 2025 at 3:07 PM
ajordanxiii.bsky.social
Fine, here are the good pictures.
Bramble the golden Labrador smiles goofily into the camera.
August 10, 2025 at 8:10 PM
ajordanxiii.bsky.social
Well I definitely forgot to horny post so instead have some old pictures I have made extra pretentious and B&W of me so that I may be emotionally validated while I beast a hunk of cheese and binge watch crime dramas in loose fitting sweat pants.
A handsome face in black and white. A handsome face in black and white. A handsome face in black and white. A handsome face in black and white.
August 10, 2025 at 7:17 PM
ajordanxiii.bsky.social
I played briefly at launch but haven't been back yet, I did reinstall AC Odyssey for nostalgia reasons recently but I feel it could be time to try Shadows again. I just had a bunch of other games grabbing me at the time. It's so pretty though I fear my time will spent snapping ducks again.
Some absolutely adorable ducklings follow a mother duck through some pond weed and lilly pads in assassin's creed shadows.
August 5, 2025 at 7:07 PM
ajordanxiii.bsky.social
I showed you my worm, plz respond.
A sandworm from the video game Dune Awakening is moving towards the camera to consume a player character.
July 10, 2025 at 5:55 PM
ajordanxiii.bsky.social
This games loading screens get me.
A blue screen with gold text that reads as follows. "Spice Addiction. Spice prolongs life and expands consciousness - but it is also hopelessly addictive."
June 30, 2025 at 8:44 PM
ajordanxiii.bsky.social
I showed you my worm, plz respond.
A character in rustic looking sci-fi armour with goggles and a full face cover stands in front of some ornithopters and a huge sandstone pyramid building. I tracked bike zooms across some sand dunes as a huge Dune sand worm erupts from the desert behind them, two moons of different sizes can be seen in the night sky and some unusual rock formations. A character clad in a cape crouches overlooking the desert dunes at night, a huge moon can be seen with a spaceship of some kind passing in front of it causing a large silhouette. The image is a dusky blue overall. I character in a cape looks towards a sunrise over some huge rocks and sand dunes, warm orange and yellow light baths the image, some buildings can be seen to the left.
June 17, 2025 at 8:51 PM
ajordanxiii.bsky.social
I would like to take a moment and appreciate the absolutely gorgeous fantasy world that @keengamesstudio.bsky.social has crafted for Enshrouded. I could live here happily ever after, especially if they added a dedicated photo mode.
A person in leather armour stands with a sword and shield in the centre of a sun dappled grove, volumetric light pouring through the warm green leaves and onto some broken masonry and old woodwork. A small house can be seen to the left among the trees. The same character stands in front of some ancient ruins, overrun by creeping vines and bushes, the floor is dense with foliage. Sunlight casts shadows across the old ruins. Two characters stand atop a stone building looking towards the sunrise as light beams pour into the frame showcasing a dense woodland and deep banks of rolling fog.
May 25, 2025 at 1:42 PM
ajordanxiii.bsky.social
I'm not even mad at this.

openpsychometrics.org/tests/charac...
Indiana Jones Buffy the vampire slayer Dr Ian Malcolm Robin Buckley
May 19, 2025 at 11:32 PM
ajordanxiii.bsky.social
Done
Bramble the golden labrador puppy viciously attacks a car cage while looking adorable and cute and not at all scary. Bramble the golden labrador naps on a plushie giraffe Bramble the golden labrador is now licking the car cage and is best friends with it, while looking cute as fuck. Bramble the golden labrador is in her teenage long limbs phase and looks goofy while climbing up her human to show them she loves them.
May 17, 2025 at 1:30 PM