It was over before it Blarted

‪Next thing you know in two months I’m gonna start seeing people go “you know what, Stalker isn’t that good anyway!” with my luck lol‬

Read through the thread again. I mention it like three times.

I mean Shrek being Scottish was him too, right? Cuz Farley wasn’t doing that in his version. So it really is just him and his love of doing bad Scottish accents…

Which kinda makes it weirder. Like if he had then you could argue he likes mostly having that creative control in his star vehicles but…no from the beginning he was taking roles he had no part in scripting so it’s not that.

I mean Cat in the Hat and Goldmember underperformed but still made a profit, and The Love Guru didn’t flop horribly, there’s been worse bombs. So it seems it was also just yeah, times changed. But it is a bit bizarre. I don’t know how many actors have made that much money per starring role.

You’d think he’d get like…a romcom or some meatier supporting acting roles. The Love Guru bombed but technically not by a lot, it was a critical disaster but I feel like those aren’t rare for big comedic stars either.

And sure enough the only movies he has in development are sequels to Wayne’s World, Shrek, and Austin Powers. Two he literally wrote, and Shrek being a huge moneymaker. And yet yeah, he doesn’t really do much outside of that trio. Which is weird, right? He’s certainly talented.

So like if we’re just counting his big starring roles…it’s Austin Powers, Shrek, Wayne’s World, Cat in the Hat, The Love Guru, and Axe Murderer. He WROTE every Austin Powers and Wayne’s World. The only other movie he wrote being…the Love Guru, okay I get the disappointment now.

A 30+ year career and about half of it is just three series. And the rest are mostly like…cameos in Bohemian Rhapsody and Inglorious Basterds, supporting roles in Amsterdam and 54, and his three other star vehicles Cat in the Hat, the Love Guru, and So I Married An Axe Murderer.

That one kinda flopped though, I meant like the big big successes

It’s not even that I think all of these are good, in fact I don’t, I highlighted Blades of Glory because WHO EVEN REMEMBERS THAT ONE?! And yet it outsold Saw IV. His lowest cultural cache of these WAS ZOOLANDER.

And it was almost every year.

And you’ll never guess those bottom three…Zoolander, Anchorman, and Old School.

Blades of Glory made about $150 million worldwide. No Country for Old Men made $170 million the same year.

Like the kinds of media analysis videos and video essays that you're like "oh you just read a wikipedia page and vomited out a plot summary where you made jokes occasionally."

NOW HERES A GUY WHO KNOWS WHAT PEOPLE WEIGH