Peter Nincompoop
@carcrashrecorder.bsky.social
have my head in the oven so you'll know where I'll be
The move I'm going to use to become a starting NFL defensive player?
Pull the ball carrier down by their dangling mouth guard.
Pull the ball carrier down by their dangling mouth guard.
November 24, 2025 at 2:25 AM
The move I'm going to use to become a starting NFL defensive player?
Pull the ball carrier down by their dangling mouth guard.
Pull the ball carrier down by their dangling mouth guard.
Arby's has ALWAYS been my favorite steakhouse.
November 1, 2025 at 1:31 AM
Arby's has ALWAYS been my favorite steakhouse.
A Seattle Mariner throwing out quotes from Major League at the same time the movie is happening in real life is blasphemous!
The Land shall not stand for this!
The Land shall not stand for this!
September 25, 2025 at 3:55 PM
A Seattle Mariner throwing out quotes from Major League at the same time the movie is happening in real life is blasphemous!
The Land shall not stand for this!
The Land shall not stand for this!
Trump watches fireworks on TV.
July 5, 2025 at 2:29 AM
Trump watches fireworks on TV.
Anybody else skipping Flag Day this year?
June 9, 2025 at 6:27 PM
Anybody else skipping Flag Day this year?
Even Ronald Reagan's airport sucks.
May 1, 2025 at 10:00 PM
Even Ronald Reagan's airport sucks.
Spoiler Alert: It's not Batman... It's Bateman!
March 22, 2025 at 3:34 AM
Spoiler Alert: It's not Batman... It's Bateman!
Remember when the US boycotted the 1980 Olympics due to Soviet aggression? Times sure have changed.
February 18, 2025 at 11:33 PM
Remember when the US boycotted the 1980 Olympics due to Soviet aggression? Times sure have changed.
Stop the shove! Give it to the best running back in the league.
January 26, 2025 at 10:45 PM
Stop the shove! Give it to the best running back in the league.
I hope trump brings back Freedom Fries. Better yet... He should change the name of all foods with countries in the name.
January 8, 2025 at 12:11 AM
I hope trump brings back Freedom Fries. Better yet... He should change the name of all foods with countries in the name.
Where does RFK land on iodine in table salt? Maybe that is the source of all our troubles?
December 18, 2024 at 12:46 AM
Where does RFK land on iodine in table salt? Maybe that is the source of all our troubles?
Why is it called "Puppy Chow"? Who made the first batch and thought, "Now how am I going to get kids to eat this cereal that I just doused with chocolate, peanut butter, and powdered sugar? I know! I'll call it Puppy Chow! Kids love puppies!"
December 17, 2024 at 6:41 PM
Why is it called "Puppy Chow"? Who made the first batch and thought, "Now how am I going to get kids to eat this cereal that I just doused with chocolate, peanut butter, and powdered sugar? I know! I'll call it Puppy Chow! Kids love puppies!"
Migrant caravans!
December 17, 2024 at 5:04 PM
Migrant caravans!
The Pontiac Bandit was on fire tonight in Denver
December 3, 2024 at 4:41 AM
The Pontiac Bandit was on fire tonight in Denver
Time to get serious for a second. Why don't we stuff potatoes in the turkey? Wouldn't that make some sick ass mashed potatoes?
November 27, 2024 at 3:57 PM
Time to get serious for a second. Why don't we stuff potatoes in the turkey? Wouldn't that make some sick ass mashed potatoes?
Rosie Perez is to boxing as Woody Harrelson is to basketball.
November 16, 2024 at 4:47 AM
Rosie Perez is to boxing as Woody Harrelson is to basketball.
Is this where Tom went?
November 15, 2024 at 6:34 PM
Is this where Tom went?
Did I finally figure out Twitter?
November 15, 2024 at 6:21 PM
Did I finally figure out Twitter?