Blue Collar Cthulhu
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Blue Collar Cthulhu
@bluecollarcthulhu.bsky.social
33 followers 34 following 120 posts
Welding reality shut one spark at a time. Union strong, eldritch tough. Blue Collar Cthulhu clocks in at dawn, fights cosmic corruption by lunch, and still makes it home for meatloaf. 🛠️🐙✊ #BlueCollarCthulhu #Local666 bluecollarcthulhu.com
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WHO IS BLUE COLLAR CTHULHU?

In the rusted shadows of the docks and the flickering lights of the midnight shift, something ancient stirs. He’s got tentacles, a union card, and a lunchbox full of existential dread. 🧵
Because if the world’s gonna end,

I’d rather it be from a busted beer bottle on the couch
than a mushroom cloud in the sky.
So here’s my two cents:

Keep our heads cool, our hands steady, and our eyes on the real prize—a future where we don’t have to live in fear of the next big bang.
We don’t need more bombs.

We need more jobs.

More respect.

More union halls filled with folks fightin’ for a better life—not a better war.
And restartin’ nuclear weapons testing?

That ain’t how you win a Nobel Peace Prize.

It’s how you make folks wonder if you’re playin’ checkers while the rest of us are tryin’ to play chess.
Nuclear tests don’t just rattle the earth—they rattle the nerves of every blue-collar worker tryin’ to put food on the table.
Look, I get it. Power’s a game.

Sometimes you gotta show you mean business.

But there’s a difference between strength and recklessness.
We’re talkin’ about makin’ the world a whole lot more dangerous.

And for what?

So some folks can feel tough on TV?
Now I ain’t no politician, but I know a thing or two about workin’ hard and keepin’ the peace.

Restartin’ these tests ain’t just flexin’ muscles—it’s pokin’ a hornet’s nest that could sting us all.
🧵 Blue Collar Cthulhu on Nuclear Testing: A Thread

Well folks, lemme tell ya—when I heard Trump wants to restart nuclear testing, I nearly dropped my beer.

Nuclear tests? In this day and age?

It’s like tryin’ to bring back the Stone Age with a chainsaw.
That’s how empires rot—from the keel up. And I know rot. I am rot. You keep this up, and the ocean’s gonna answer. And it don’t send lawyers. It sends storms.
🌊🦑

Let me know if you want a version formatted for Bluesky, Threads, or a carousel panel—this one’s got legs (and tentacles).
I ain’t got a soft spot for smugglers. But I got a hard spot for truth. You wanna fight crime? Use law. You wanna fight war? Declare one. But don’t bomb the poor and call it patriotism.
You treat every poor bastard with a boat and a bad break like an enemy combatant, you ain’t fightin’ a war—you’re makin’ one. You’re stirrin’ up the deep. And buddy, I *am* the deep.
And don’t get me started on the mixed signals. One day the Marines are salutin’ marathoners at the finish line. Next day? They’re salutin’ a drone feed while a skiff goes up in flames. That ain’t honor. That’s confusion.
International waters ain’t the Wild West. There’s rules. Maritime law. Human rights. You don’t just erase a boat full of people without proof, trial, or even a damn warning. That ain’t justice—it’s vengeance in uniform.
They call it a “strike on narco-terrorists.” I call it what it is: state-sponsored piracy. You don’t get to skip the courts and drop bombs on civilians just ‘cause you’ve got a flag on your hull and a press release ready.
And they’re usin’ missiles. MISSILES. That’s like usin’ a harpoon to swat a fly ‘cause you think it looked at you funny. Since when did suspicion become a death sentence?
You ever hear somethin’ so backwards it makes your gills twitch? That’s how I felt when I heard Trump’s out here blowin’ up fishin’ boats. Not warships. Not pirate fleets. Fishin’ boats. Boats that might be runnin’ drugs—or might just be runnin’ dinner.
Trump’s Navy firing missiles at fishing boats suspected of smuggling drugs isn’t law enforcement—it’s piracy with paperwork. Blue Collar Cthulhu has thoughts. 🦑⚓️ #Monologue #InternationalLaw #Satire #MarineMadness
🧵

Follow Blue here or at bluecollarcthulhu.com
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Now hand me that red corner piece. Justice needs a new foundation. 🐙🛠️✊

Follow Blue on all his socials at bluecollarcthulhu.com
But we show up. We build. We fix. Not for glory. Not for gods. For each other. For the ones still holding on.
This ain’t a renovation. It’s a resurrection. And it’ll take years. Maybe decades. Maybe longer than the stars remember.
You ever rebuild a democracy with a 2x4 blue stud? I have. Constitution’s leaking. Bill of Rights needs reinforcement. And the manual’s been replaced with vibes.
It ain’t just the building. It’s the foundation: facts, decency, basic damn logic. We’re stackin’ bricks like it’ll hold back fascism. Spoiler: it barely does.
Folks ask, “Why LEGO?”
Because reality’s been shattered into toy-sized pieces. No steel. No stone. Just plastic bricks and cosmic patience.