Author | Lightnews

Will Murray @willmmmm.bsky.social · 1d

What does getting set up with someone by mutual friends have anything to do with the time of ice cream socials? What a weird way to frame it.

Reposted by Will Murray

murph @seabaitshop.bsky.social · 2d

bro did a death drop like he’s lipsyncing for the crown

Jill Krajewski @jillkrajewski.bsky.social · 2d

HANG IT IN THE LOUVRE

ernie clement with the most photogenic slide home, leg kicking, arm outstretched, and smiling

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Will Murray @willmmmm.bsky.social · 3d

Guilty.

Will Murray @willmmmm.bsky.social · 4d

They made a short movie to go along with the Cereal Killer album that my friend had but his dad confiscated it. It's probably out there on the internet somewhere.

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Will Murray @willmmmm.bsky.social · 6d

I finished this book on a long distance car drive with my parents and brother. I groaned so hard at this line it distracted my dad who was driving and he swerved into the shoulder.

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Will Murray @willmmmm.bsky.social · 6d

I simply cannot countenance bringing a child into a world in which his ghostly form lurks.

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Will Murray @willmmmm.bsky.social · 6d

Paranoia, impotent rage, feeling disconnected from reality. It really checks all the boxes.

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Will Murray @willmmmm.bsky.social · 7d

Is this a recipe for eating or is it like a skin exfoliant? I've seen scrubs with coffee grounds in them, so maybe it's a DIY version?

Will Murray @willmmmm.bsky.social · 9d

It's the new shelf stable Whopper they have been working on in secret for the last 20 years.

Will Murray @willmmmm.bsky.social · 9d

No typo, I meant Whooper.

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Will Murray @willmmmm.bsky.social · 9d

Mail everyone in America a free Whooper Jr. They have the technology, but do they have the will?

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Will Murray @willmmmm.bsky.social · 10d

Look up seafood Aqua Pazza and be ready to have your mind blown.

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Reposted by Will Murray

Jack McGovan @jackmcgovan.bsky.social · 12d

"In the two years since the state started charging a 4% surtax on incomes over $1 million, the effort has created a $5.7 billion windfall, with the surplus being used to fund bridge repairs, bolster literacy programs and address the transportation system’s budget deficit."

Taxing the rich works!

Millionaire Tax That Inspired Mamdani Fuels $5.7 Billion Haul in Massachusetts

A millionaire levy in Massachusetts that New York City mayoral frontrunner Zohran Mamdani holds up as a model for taxing the rich has generated $3 billion more in revenue than expected without forcing...

www.bloomberg.com

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Will Murray @willmmmm.bsky.social · 12d

Sorry, I can't cosign to this Tomfoolery anymore.

a close up of a man in a military uniform with a cross on his collar

ALT: a close up of a man in a military uniform with a cross on his collar

media.tenor.com

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Will Murray @willmmmm.bsky.social · 13d

I might just start rending my own flesh before I even got there.

Will Murray @willmmmm.bsky.social · 16d

There's probably a 'finding and returning a lost dog' step before going full baby.

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Will Murray @willmmmm.bsky.social · 16d

At the very least, you should probably do some light stretching. My man's quads and hammys looked pretty tight when he 'accelerated' there.

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Will Murray @willmmmm.bsky.social · 17d

Welp...

Will Murray @willmmmm.bsky.social · 20d

Aren't these the same people who constantly lament about western birthrates? I guess expecting them to have consistent logic is a fools game, but come the fuck on.

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Will Murray @willmmmm.bsky.social · 21d

Sitting on my porch, sipping my coffee while the toddler and I wait for daycare to be open. A Honda Accord drives by at a respectful speed.

"Honey, after this it's One Subaru After Another."

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Will Murray @willmmmm.bsky.social · 21d

Yesterday's 1 pm slate was pretty brutal.

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Will Murray @willmmmm.bsky.social · 21d

Just make it lApple TVl, then you don't have to worry about those pesky plusses and minuses.

Will Murray @willmmmm.bsky.social · 22d

It's basically a sous vide in there at this point.

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Will Murray @willmmmm.bsky.social · 23d

This would take me out for 2 days afterwards.

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Will Murray @willmmmm.bsky.social · 23d

He'll sure be DARTing around if that's the case! *rimshot*

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