Jessica Stoya
@stoya.bsky.social
16K followers 380 following 2.7K posts
Writer. Raconteur. Sex Icon. Intimacy coach through BestSelfPsych (but not a psychotherapist). Regular column at Slate, occasional bylines elsewhere. USA born. Living in Serbia. Retired from adult due to difficulties accessing payment for lewd work
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stoya.bsky.social
Why (in the sense of an actual question) is the extremely vast majority of dental hygiene products some kind of mint?

Related: did you know mint toothpaste isn’t supposed to burn like fire for a couple of hours after you brush? I didn’t until this summer
Reposted by Jessica Stoya
chelseagsummers.bsky.social
As part of @everylibrary.bsky.social's roster of events for Banned Book Week (buy a banned book @bookshop.org), Jessica Stoya and I talked about Fanny Hill, criminal and civil book bans, and the US Supreme Court:
Why Fanny Hill Still Turns Heads with Chelsea G. Summers and Jessica Stoya
YouTube video by EveryLibrary
www.youtube.com
Reposted by Jessica Stoya
stoya.bsky.social
This half drunk man was about to tell me why, for the past several months, he has been confidently assuming I am Russian despite my complete inability to roll an r

And then he got distracted

As tipsy people tend to
stoya.bsky.social
It is dumb! It is ignorant! And it also works in one of several ways when it is inescapable for prolonged periods of time.
ruz-el.bsky.social
I'm so used to seeing their politics as dumb and ignorant that I miss how insidious the intent behind statements like Vance's are.
stoya.bsky.social
My completely flaming hot take on “Wayward” is that, as much as it drastically underplays the reality of teen reprogramming camps, it serves as a palatable-to-the-blissfully-uninitiated primer on some of the mind warping tactics

Which are often used by the current US administration
jessicacalarco.com
Weaponized gratitude is a key tool in the abuser's toolkit. The goal is to convince the victim that they owe the abuser so much, they should feel guilty for wanting to complain.
Tweet from the VP:
Joy Reid has had such a good life in this country. It's been
overwhelmingly kind and gracious to her. She is far wealthier than most.
Yet she oozes with contempt.
My honest, non-trolling advice to Joy Reid is that you'd be a much
happier person if you showed a little gratitude
stoya.bsky.social
… they please replace it with one that is actually representative of how I tend to look?
stoya.bsky.social
So, now that the US government is shutting down nonessential operations, is it a good time to tell the consulate that I really dislike my passport photo because I got too close to the old one expiring when I was still recalibrating from a deeply regrettable (and failed) hormone treatment so could…
stoya.bsky.social
So, now that the US government is shutting down nonessential operations, is it a good time to tell the consulate that I really dislike my passport photo because I got too close to the old one expiring when I was still recalibrating from a deeply regrettable (and failed) hormone treatment so could…
stoya.bsky.social
Bonded pairs are wonderful
stoya.bsky.social
“Allowed to focus on… where we feel our voices will be effective” 💕
scalzi.com
Yes and also we all aren't outrage jukeboxes, you can't just press a button and have us be outraged on request. We're all allowed to focus on what we want and where we feel our voices will be effective right now, and trust that others will fight the other fights worth fighting. It's a group effort.
dawnxianamoon.bsky.social
Them: Where was your outrage for [awful thing unrelated to the post they're replying to]??!

Me: ... Clearly you don't actually follow me on social media where I've been ranting for years. 🙄
stoya.bsky.social
I stay in my own lane and I avoid a lot of pain
stoya.bsky.social
Yes

I have two friends in Belgrade who absolutely adore Parker Posey, and they’re slowly zeroing in on the exact amounts of wine and wound-up emotional state which produce the drawl and vocabulary switch most effectively
stoya.bsky.social
I do pay a little extra for the hand-holding tier

It works out as less expensive and more efficient than bothering lawyers and accountants with things that are below their level but above my head when I first encounter them
stoya.bsky.social
I love the payroll company I use in the US

Every time, I get nervous. Revert to North Carolina accent. Say things like “do you have some kind of add on that keeps track of numbers things that aren’t payroll?”

Then I apologize and explain that I write about non-business subjects

They’re patient
stoya.bsky.social
I assumed, and, regretting my assumption, apologize
stoya.bsky.social
I love the payroll company I use in the US

Every time, I get nervous. Revert to North Carolina accent. Say things like “do you have some kind of add on that keeps track of numbers things that aren’t payroll?”

Then I apologize and explain that I write about non-business subjects

They’re patient
stoya.bsky.social
With a little more executive function, the past two days could have each been half at my desk and half on my feet

Alas…
stoya.bsky.social
These sentences are far too succinct to function as parody of the thick, euphemism packed, ruffling pages which, stacked delicately all against each other at once, make up this massively censored and debated novel of a book
stoya.bsky.social
I think you’re in expert territory with foodstuffs? Adjacent, at least.
stoya.bsky.social
My orbs were titillated

I injected nothing balsamic

Only thoughts and opinions

But I suppose some of those could be considered tart, sweet, or simultaneously both
chelseagsummers.bsky.social
Anyway preorder this new edition of Fanny Hill with a forward by me and a conversation with @stoya.bsky.social. It'll titillate your twin orbs and perhaps induce a balsamic injection.
Reposted by Jessica Stoya
chelseagsummers.bsky.social
Anyway preorder this new edition of Fanny Hill with a forward by me and a conversation with @stoya.bsky.social. It'll titillate your twin orbs and perhaps induce a balsamic injection.
Reposted by Jessica Stoya
chelseagsummers.bsky.social
Reminder that Fanny Hill was banned, litigated, expurgated, rereleased, banned, litigated, edited, rereleased, banned in the UK, banned in the US, litigated, rereleased, and now faces potential bans again. All this for a book with no expletives and espouses a clearly capitalist bourgeoise agenda.
unnamedpress.bsky.social
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stoya.bsky.social
Ne, hvala

He wouldn’t even allow an eye patch
stoya.bsky.social
Like, the oils we use for cooking?