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Stonemanwitch @stonemanwitch.bsky.social · 18h

Mom had dental surgery today and got all her teeth liked for her new dentures. She’s been groggy but we got ice cream for her. … and me.

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Stonemanwitch @stonemanwitch.bsky.social · 1d

The people demand answers.

Stonemanwitch @stonemanwitch.bsky.social · 2d

There’s this really annoying trend in stand-up right now of guys saying things like, “I know I look gay but I’m actually straight lol.”
My guy, you have a nose ring and an unconditioned mullet. You look like ever other straight person under 35, calm down.

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Stonemanwitch @stonemanwitch.bsky.social · 2d

I got food but the delivery guy gave me someone else’s order. Luckily the girl at the front desk loves sushi so it made her night. I like when things work out like that.

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Stonemanwitch @stonemanwitch.bsky.social · 3d

@althaeasebastiani.bsky.social thank you so much, friend! 🙏

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Stonemanwitch @stonemanwitch.bsky.social · 6d

Arw you looking for something spooky to read this October? Might i suggest my book Whopperjaw. a.co/d/0J1I653

Amazon.com

a.co

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Stonemanwitch @stonemanwitch.bsky.social · 6d

The whole hotel floor smells like church food.
Better than skunkweed, I guess.

Stonemanwitch @stonemanwitch.bsky.social · 7d

I am ready to fuck off to Man Island and never return.

Stonemanwitch @stonemanwitch.bsky.social · 7d

The re-normalization of homophobia on and offline in America is making me mean in ways I never wanted to be. I used to take it as water off a ducks back, but now I can’t.

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Stonemanwitch @stonemanwitch.bsky.social · 9d

My spiritual tradition has a book club and a few of us are going to be reading Something Wicked This Way Comes. It feels good to have something fun to look forward to.

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Stonemanwitch @stonemanwitch.bsky.social · 9d

But what if I need extra love (a sundae)?

Stonemanwitch @stonemanwitch.bsky.social · 9d

Watching a British woman on instagram visit Michigan for the first time. I couldn’t help but yell at the screen, “Go to Frankenmuth!! Get some fudge!!!”

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Stonemanwitch @stonemanwitch.bsky.social · 9d

All I really want is to be loved. … and some soft pretzels with beer cheese.

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Stonemanwitch @stonemanwitch.bsky.social · 9d

I don’t want to hate people. I don’t like hating people. But I’ll never forgive this man for making me hate him. He has done far worse things to my family than stealing from me.

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Stonemanwitch @stonemanwitch.bsky.social · 9d

Mom: “stepdad went to the ER last night. His colitis came back.”
Me: “oh no. Did he finally poop out the $90 he stole from me?”

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Stonemanwitch @stonemanwitch.bsky.social · 10d

You guys!! My hotel room neighbors have two red golden retrievers named Duke and Buddy!!!

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Stonemanwitch @stonemanwitch.bsky.social · 10d

Uncle: “You know you and your mom are more than welcome to come live with me.”
Me: “in Seattle? Just leave Indiana for Seattle with zero money during a lawsuit?”
Uncle: “technically it’s Tacoma.”
Me “…”

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Stonemanwitch @stonemanwitch.bsky.social · 10d

The boxes we check can influence us, sure, but so does just being a person. Ultimately there is so much innate to the human experience that is mystical and universal.

Stonemanwitch @stonemanwitch.bsky.social · 10d

You’re interested in magic and the occult because it’s interesting, because humans naturally seek the mystical — we want to feel connected to something bigger and deeper and grander and meaningful. That’s why religions exist.

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Stonemanwitch @stonemanwitch.bsky.social · 10d

We can feel cut off from these things because we romanticize them, as well as a myriad of other social, ecological, and political reasons, but I assure you, it’s always there with you. It’s not going anywhere.

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Stonemanwitch @stonemanwitch.bsky.social · 10d

You’re in touch with magic, nature, and the universe by default, because you’re a person who is a part of these things. Humans are not outsiders looking in, we are just as organic as trees and stars.

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Stonemanwitch @stonemanwitch.bsky.social · 10d

This is no different than when people say having a uterus makes you more “in touch with the universe” or being certain ethnicities makes you more “in touch with nature.”

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Stonemanwitch @stonemanwitch.bsky.social · 11d

Thanks everyone for sharing this. Things have actually gotten worse this week. Anything helps.

Stonemanwitch @stonemanwitch.bsky.social · 11d

My mom loves this show so I’ve seen ever episode a thousand times. We even quote it together.

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Stonemanwitch @stonemanwitch.bsky.social · 11d

This was one of my favorite movies as a kid!

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