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kinocow

@kinocow.com

420 followers 230 following 800 posts

grass is always green on the screen - www.kinocow.com

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kinocow @kinocow.com · Mar 1

Started to casually look for flats in Berlin, gave up a few minutes later. Wtfuck happened to this city? I think I need to depend on serendipity, luck and connections for this one. Anyone who knows anyone who knows anyone recommend me pls.

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kinocow @kinocow.com · Aug 9

Berlin weather report: Sun is sunning today, time to use my early supply of sunscreen in two hours.

kinocow @kinocow.com · Jul 16

Totally. Had a couple of landlords who opened the doors have their jaws drop to find a brown person niggled their way to the viewing slot. I just go for the look of bewilderment on the face.

kinocow @kinocow.com · Jul 16

Like seriously, makes 1000€ less than my real self and still gets a viewing appointment? I need a fake id, printing one now.

a person holding a hawaii driver license in their hand

ALT: a person holding a hawaii driver license in their hand

media.tenor.com

kinocow @kinocow.com · Jul 16

Applying for Berlin flats 3 months in:

Apply for flat with two accounts one with my Indian name and the other with Michael Scott, and the Indian one gets a prompt rejection while Michael Scott always gets an invite. I make sure that Michael Scott appears more sketchy but guy keeps pushing through.

michael scott from the office says `` all i can do right now is put on a brave face '' .

ALT: michael scott from the office says `` all i can do right now is put on a brave face '' .

media.tenor.com

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Reposted by kinocow

Tristan Cork @tristancorkpost.bsky.social · Jul 14

🧵Little story- one of those which, if I hadn't seen it myself, but you told me about it, I wouldn't have believed you.
I’m in my local shop & one of the street's loud young characters comes in - proper Bemmie, always seems to have a can & be up to something. You can imagine...

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kinocow @kinocow.com · Jul 15

Rarely watch a movie these days that I find worthy of talking about. Support the Girls is one of them. Left me with more kindness and empathy towards the end of it and it's blessed with flawless performances and great writing. Grab a big ass beer and enjoy.

kinocow @kinocow.com · Jul 3

Shrinkflation:

Used to be able to eat 9 pieces of fried chicken without breaking a sweat but now I'm done at 6.5 pieces and a bucketful of sweat. Future me will just get full for a week by imagining a chicken.

a chicken is hanging upside down from a pole in a house .

ALT: a chicken is hanging upside down from a pole in a house .

media.tenor.com

kinocow @kinocow.com · Jul 3

People are so dirty, i can't even.

kinocow @kinocow.com · Jul 3

My ice cream policy is to only eat one when I did something that really deserves it. So far this year I've had one ice cream.

kinocow @kinocow.com · Jul 3

On a work team call a colleague asked another German colleague why he was low today. I jumped in without thinking too much, "Herr Wurst might come late, but when he comes he comes hard" and there was a loooong minute of silence until I realized what I did.

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kinocow @kinocow.com · Jul 3

"Can you wait for 30 minutes? Is that fine for you?"
"I waited for 9 months to come onto this planet, so I'm fine with 30 minutes"

kinocow @kinocow.com · Jul 3

In a swimming class:

"Where should my legs be? Should there be under the water or above the water"
"Kinocow, if your legs are above the water it's called flying and when they're inside the water it's called swimming. Here to swim aren't you?"
(drowning)
"Jdfjakks"

kinocow @kinocow.com · Jul 3

In Vizag we have fans. Here we have heat boxes.

kinocow @kinocow.com · Jul 1

Berlin weather report: So hot that my eyes are melting.

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kinocow @kinocow.com · Jul 1

No feta fetish only foot relish

kinocow @kinocow.com · Jul 1

Anything that says Arla Buko India isn't a recommendation from me.

kinocow @kinocow.com · Jul 1

Now I make it a point to look at the names on the doorbells of the buildings in the neighborhoods I like, and it's mostly European, white. Seems like the Indian ghetto is North Berlin where I definitely wouldn't want to live.

kinocow @kinocow.com · Jul 1

Can empathize with people who find the Berlin flat hunting experience harrowing. As a brown cow i had 0.5% conversion rate to view a flat (out of 200 flats) and with a German sounding name, Michael Scott, I got 4 viewings out of 10 applications but no conversions.

kinocow @kinocow.com · Jul 1

Smells like sweaty armpits tastes like an electric shock.

Seb Downie-Blackwell :soon: Games Ground @downieseb.bsky.social · Jun 16

"India" flavoured cream cheese, eh? Paging @kinocow.com

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kinocow @kinocow.com · Jun 14

Hattingen calling.

Random Restaurant Bot @restaurant-bot.bsky.social · Jun 14

Restaurant Einhorn; Horst 3, 45525 Hattingen, Germany https://www.google.com/maps/search/?api=1&query=51.39899399999999%2C7.1846539&query_place_id=ChIJG1UgmD3fuEcRaL_AQrdF5U0

kinocow @kinocow.com · Jun 14

Berlin weather report: Sad that at work off-site in Mallorca.

Robert Atkins @ratkins.net · Jun 11

I am not at all sad to be at a work offsite in Mallorca right now.

kinocow @kinocow.com · Jun 11

Berlin weather report: This year summer decided to take a Deutsche Bahn train.

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Reposted by kinocow

Angus Johnston @angus.bsky.social · May 29

This is very much like the audience for Playboy magazine in the late 1960s, and for intriguingly resonant reasons.

Shiv Ramdas Mens Rice Activist @nameshiv.bsky.social · May 28

been saying this for like 3 years now, the core constituency of the "manosphere" is not Gen Z or teenage boys, it is 35-55 year old dudes who wish they were still teenage boys

The real impasta @therealimpasta.bsky.social · May 28

How do famous right-wing influencers actually poll with young men in 2025?

Rogan: 27% favorable, 35% unfavorable, 45% don't know/never heard of
Theo Von: 21% fav, 16% unfav, 55% dk
Andrew Tate: 12% fav, 47% unfav, 36% dk

Source: iop.harvard.edu/youth-poll/5...

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kinocow @kinocow.com · May 29

"What's your insta?"
"Don't have one"
"How can that be?"
"It's not mandatory right"
"Still, how do you know what's happening?"
"There's a thousand other ways"
"Still.. how do I send my vacation pictures?"
"Email?"
"You're a boomer"

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kinocow @kinocow.com · May 29

Same article: "The graffiti on the signs appeared in the past few days, and has itself been vandalised, with the letter ‘r’ painted over on the sign on the north side of the road, so that it now reads ‘No poo people allowed’, instead.". The journalist writing this had a good week.

Tristan Cork @tristancorkpost.bsky.social · May 29

The new signs for one of the bus gates of the East Bristol Liveable Neighbourhood have been vandalised before it's even gone live
Read more here:
www.bristolpost.co.uk/news/bristol...

New bus gate signs already vandalised ahead of launch

'No poor people allowed'

www.bristolpost.co.uk

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