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Joe Parlock

@joeparlock.bsky.social

510 followers 260 following 380 posts

Tabletop And Video Game Writer & Editor | He/him 🌈🦓🐻 | [email protected] | Icon by Antonio Demico

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Joe Parlock @joeparlock.bsky.social · Sep 9

Bit of personal news: after four years, I've been let go from @thegamerweb.bsky.social and am a free agent!

If you need someone with half a decade of TCG and tabletop and over a decade of video game coverage experience, please get in touch at [email protected]!

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Joe Parlock @joeparlock.bsky.social · 2h

I am all about those video & casino games

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Joe Parlock @joeparlock.bsky.social · 2d

Aaah okay, I'm very sorry for your loss and it drag it up again three months later

Joe Parlock @joeparlock.bsky.social · 2d

Hey, sorry to bother you. I've been wondering about what happened to a Mitch Alexander from Glasgow I lost touch with a few years ago, and I'm worried this might be about him. Is this the same Mitch that made Tusks: The Orc Dating Simulator?

Joe Parlock @joeparlock.bsky.social · 2d

Megabonk

Joe Parlock @joeparlock.bsky.social · 3d

To the tune of Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles

Joe Parlock @joeparlock.bsky.social · 3d

Session average targets increasing

🏰meg⚔️ @Birthright Audiobook! @impavid.us · 6d

In honor of spooky month, share a 4 word horror story that only someone in your profession would understand

I'll go first: Six page commercial lease.

Joe Parlock @joeparlock.bsky.social · 4d

Hell yeah

Sky News @news.sky.com · 4d

Lostprophets singer Ian Watkins dies after attack in prison

Paedophile Lostprophets singer Ian Watkins has died after being attacked in prison.

news.sky.com

Joe Parlock @joeparlock.bsky.social · 5d

Me: nonstop whining about UB
Also me: I need to build my boys Bebop and Rocksteady

Magic: The Gathering @magic.wizards.com · 5d

Prepare to clash against your favorite TMNT villains! Here are a few you'll come across in #MTGxTMNT.

This image depicts the card "Super Shredder". One Mana, one black. Legendary Creature - Mutant Ninja Human. Mythic rarity.

Card Art: This is an illustration of the gigantic monterous mutated form of a man, his once well fitted armor cutting into his body like sharp metallic spines. The mutant reaches towards the viewer with a claw as it rushes through any obsticle in his way.

Rules text: Menace.
Whenever another permanent leaves the battlefield, put a +1/+1 counter on Super Shreder.

Flavor text: "I have molded myself into perfection, Hamato. Look upon me, and know fear."

This image depicts the card "Krang, Master Mind". Six mana, two blue. Legendary Artifact Creature - Utrom Warrior. Rare Rarity.

Card art:
This illustration shows a squid like being wearing a bipedal mechanical suit. It's head is covered by a orb helmet while its tentacles pop out of 'arm' holes to hold up two large drills. The creature laughs maniacally.

Rules text: Affinity for Artifacts. (This spell costs One Mana less to cast for each artifact you control.)
When Krang enters, if you have fewer than four cards in hand, draw cards equal to the difference.
Krang gets +1/+0 for each other artifact you control. Power one/toughness four.

This image depicts the card "Bebop & Rocksteady". One mana, two black or green. Legendary Creature - Boar Rhio Mutant. Rare rarity.

Card art: This illustration depicts two mutants: A humanoid boar and a humanoid rhino. The pair stand gloriously upon the wreckage of cars as colorful sprays of energy explode behind them. The Rhino holds a large tire above his head.

Rules text: Whenever Bebop & Rocksteady attack or block, sacrifice a permanent unless you discard a card.

Flavor text: "They'll beat you with firsts, with a bat, with a knife. / So don't try to steop them, just run for your life! / Get set and get ready, / For Bebop & Rocksteady!"

Joe Parlock @joeparlock.bsky.social · 5d

Is New York the quickest setting we've ever gone back to after its debut? Discounting blocks and one-off cards like March of the Machine's sieges?

Magic: The Gathering @magic.wizards.com · 5d

Cowabunga Magic players, the second set of 2026 is #MTGxTMNT!

This image depicts an illustrated city scape from a bird's eye view. Many buildings are a light with life and activity happening within. Across the image reads: "Magic: The Gathering | Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles"

Joe Parlock @joeparlock.bsky.social · 5d

Whoosh is in Verazol as a third Into the Roil effect, and Wraith is going in Detectives. Other than that, not a whole lot

Joe Parlock @joeparlock.bsky.social · 8d

Nobody needs soup more than me

Joe Parlock @joeparlock.bsky.social · 8d

Oh my god Oh my god Oh my god Oh my god Oh my god Oh my god Oh my god Oh my god

toyworldmag.co.uk/heathside-tr...

Heathside Trading and BBC announce return of Doctor Who TCG

Expanding Heathside's range with BBC Studios, the Doctor Who Battles in Time Trading Card Game will return in time for its 20th anniversary.

toyworldmag.co.uk

Joe Parlock @joeparlock.bsky.social · 10d

I've not played Digimon Story Time Stranger yet on account of having no money, but hell yeah Digimon renaissance let's go. I've been beating the digi-drum for years now.

Joe Parlock @joeparlock.bsky.social · 12d

Aw man Patricia Routledge

Joe Parlock @joeparlock.bsky.social · 12d

Playing Grounded 2 at ultrawide because I don't need to get screenshots for work anymore is a small perk I guess

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Joe Parlock @joeparlock.bsky.social · 13d

it's fucking massive and the wife is now laughing at me title of your sex tape

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Joe Parlock @joeparlock.bsky.social · 13d

cheaper and longer title of your sex tape

Joe Parlock @joeparlock.bsky.social · 13d

Going back in time to prevent both the person who invented AI and the person who introduced "slop" to modern usage

Joe Parlock @joeparlock.bsky.social · 14d

The last month has been so bad I only just realised it's time to change the page on my canal boat calendar and man

friends

canal boats rule

Joe Parlock @joeparlock.bsky.social · 14d

Trying to cancel Game Pass and the site is broken, so that's a good sign for Microsoft.

Joe Parlock @joeparlock.bsky.social · 18d

i has so much fun

Joe Parlock @joeparlock.bsky.social · 18d

Back home from Commandfest and I didn't play a single game. Still has fun, got some cards signed and blitzed the bulk boxes, although I really preferred Edgbaston to the NEC as a venue. The whole event filling up maybe a third of a single hall is a bit underwhelming.

Joe Parlock @joeparlock.bsky.social · 18d

@emmapartlow.com I think I accidentally gave you the right stinkeye, I was looking at bulk and was a million miles away, didn't realise it was you before you'd already gone 🤣

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Joe Parlock @joeparlock.bsky.social · 19d

No Astro Bot versions of each PlayStation drop is a crime.

blog.playstation.com/2025/09/26/f...

First in-depth look at Magic: The Gathering Secret Lair x PlayStation collaboration, launching this October

Featuring characters from The Last of Us, God of War, Ghost of Tsushima, Horizon Forbidden West, and more.

blog.playstation.com

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Joe Parlock @joeparlock.bsky.social · 19d

I can relate, I love Assassin's Creed :(

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