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Tess, lovingly fucked until she was dead dead dead

@brandysaurian.bsky.social

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avi/pfp is barbie wilde cenobite relaxing behind-the-scenes banner is shuna sassi, quill-lady of midian city's nightbreed ⛓️🪝configuration lamenter🩸 🏳️‍⚧️ im a poster child, i post four or five decades old 🫀 🖖 peace n long life the truth is in the mess ✨

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Tess, lovingly fucked until she was dead dead dead @brandysaurian.bsky.social · 1m

Because I know exactly what it is like to be alone in pain in the dark scared angry feral

I know what an inconvenience is and I know what a genuine problem is

Because I'm an adult with lived experience

And it feels so fucking delicious to be able to say that

Tess, lovingly fucked until she was dead dead dead @brandysaurian.bsky.social · 1m

Somebody has a $120 phone bill they needed paid I would pay it

I mean I wasn't made of money but I could finally have that bit of autonomy in my life that was impossible before

Someone needed 20 or 40 bucks For weed or groceries

Sure, done.

Tess, lovingly fucked until she was dead dead dead @brandysaurian.bsky.social · 1m

But that's why when I finally got a six-figure salary job for the first time ever a job with the best benefits that I've ever been offered

I wasn't just blowing money on my health I was also paying money in mutual aid in large amounts I'd never considered before

Tess, lovingly fucked until she was dead dead dead @brandysaurian.bsky.social · 2m

Maybe it was closer to 4 years I'm bad at math

Tess, lovingly fucked until she was dead dead dead @brandysaurian.bsky.social · 3m

She paid me 500 bucks for my tooth just like that no expectation of repayment

And I have no way to tell you how

Grateful I am

For good people

Like Athena, Athena is a good fucking person

I'm the only here by the grace of good people.

My anger and will and strength alone is not enough.

Tess, lovingly fucked until she was dead dead dead @brandysaurian.bsky.social · 3m

3 years ago I was living off the grace of a lot of people and none of them were my family of origin

An old old friend and I mean like an internet friend from like 25 years ago we've literally met like 2 or three times

Tess, lovingly fucked until she was dead dead dead @brandysaurian.bsky.social · 3m

Th reason my teeth are fucked up is because of this weird tension problem I would actually probably have pretty perfect teeth otherwise and 3 years ago I wouldn't have had one tooth crack from stress and strain

The first time it cracked I was so poor because I had already been months unemployed

Tess, lovingly fucked until she was dead dead dead @brandysaurian.bsky.social · 7m

Subtle and gross and not for the timid

Tess, lovingly fucked until she was dead dead dead @brandysaurian.bsky.social · 7m

Bodies are so fucking gross

Tess, lovingly fucked until she was dead dead dead @brandysaurian.bsky.social · 7m

They were really starting to undo the problems that had only previously ever come out during like one session of Hot yoga I had like my first great big feels like a painless velcro tear inside like what the fuck was that and it's just like fascia ripping away from an adhesion State

Tess, lovingly fucked until she was dead dead dead @brandysaurian.bsky.social · 7m

Getting some interesting referring pain in my left arm and I'm remembering a time around 2019 in which I took a hot shower and my entire right arm went numb and it's because the hot water and the other stuff I'd been doing like being on the right prescription medicine finally for a few short months

Tess, lovingly fucked until she was dead dead dead @brandysaurian.bsky.social · 8m

Also I'm very curious what's just going to reset as I sleep tonight and what I'll need to do tomorrow

Every day is a new deal from the old deck isn't it 🃏

Tess, lovingly fucked until she was dead dead dead @brandysaurian.bsky.social · 9m

When you're full of pain spite is actually like

Not a great emotion to hang on to

But like a muscle cramp

Sometimes you are unable to let go of it and so

Learning to let go you know like at all levels all over all the time always

That's the goal baby

2 + 2 = 5 thx Keanu

U got it

Tess, lovingly fucked until she was dead dead dead @brandysaurian.bsky.social · 10m

I feel so capable in being able to say for certain now what's been wrong with me my entire life and it was a fucking lot

This might just renew my vigor to live forever out of spite

I'm going to live forever anyway I just wasn't doing it in the name of spite

Reposted by Tess, lovingly fucked until she was dead dead dead

ɡwɛnəvɾ @wheneverends.bsky.social · 2h

dopamine please

selfie of a white woman from behind lying on a bed in a red bra on her side

9 4 51

Reposted by Tess, lovingly fucked until she was dead dead dead

Tess, lovingly fucked until she was dead dead dead @brandysaurian.bsky.social · 7h

awooooooooooo

jed the dog, portraying the titular character The Thing (1981) a husky on the floor of a straw-lined kennel, the meme text COME CLOSER I AM A NORMAL DOG imposed over text I WANT TO HUR YOU I WANT TO HURT YOU AS MUCH AS I POSSIBLY CAN

1 2

Tess, lovingly fucked until she was dead dead dead @brandysaurian.bsky.social · 14m

Things that affect my body language my tone my patience everything

I mean

Shit is rough dawg

Tess, lovingly fucked until she was dead dead dead @brandysaurian.bsky.social · 14m

Can you imagine me being able to literally tackle one day

Beep beep freight train coming through

But like the biggest thing that flubs interviews for me you know besides being visibly queer or whatever

Is my chronic anxiety condition just overriding what should be in normal amount of stress

Tess, lovingly fucked until she was dead dead dead @brandysaurian.bsky.social · 14m

But for 3 years of the majority of my money going towards rent medicine and weed which is also medicine

I'm grateful to have been good with computer because otherwise I wouldn't have been able to get here money-wise

I don't know what's next but

If my health is better I can tackle far more options

Reposted by Tess, lovingly fucked until she was dead dead dead

Tess, lovingly fucked until she was dead dead dead @brandysaurian.bsky.social · 7h

i think if you got a good horror director, a good horror cast, and divorced it from allll the star trek lore specifics

you could remake the episide
Sub Rosa as a great schlocky horror movie

let's

chat let's go fuck a ghost

TNG: Sub Rosa | Cinematic Trailer

YouTube video by Target Audience

www.youtube.com

1 1

Tess, lovingly fucked until she was dead dead dead @brandysaurian.bsky.social · 18m

But if my pain anxiety and guts start reacting well then maybe I can actually start being frugal instead of whatever the fuck I've been doing for years and years

Because something's got to change soon

Tess, lovingly fucked until she was dead dead dead @brandysaurian.bsky.social · 18m

The best thing I did was finally smashing my shame about spending money here and there for disability convenience

It's lasted way longer than I've wanted and I have not been able to save the money I've needed but

If you don't have your health what have you got.

Tess, lovingly fucked until she was dead dead dead @brandysaurian.bsky.social · 19m

I was out probably all afternoon but had the most capable walk I've had in a very long time, there and back again as Tolkien might say

Overall pain down too and that arm feels stronger so I know a dislocation fixed itself,, fucking finally

Getting this shit figured out

smart hulk

Tess, lovingly fucked until she was dead dead dead @brandysaurian.bsky.social · 19m

That area is probably so weirdly overdeveloped

And also woefully underdeveloped in certain ways but now I think I fixed the rotation problem and I feel like I had a workout and all I did was walk to the co-op and back but

Other days I can't walk back from the co-op and have to call a car

Tess, lovingly fucked until she was dead dead dead @brandysaurian.bsky.social · 19m

I've had a really good orthostatic response to from stretching something out in the middle top core that diamond center of the traps right between the shoulder blades right where all that tension focuses I mean I've had a full body problem for three decades or so