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@blametag.bsky.social

930 followers 920 following 12K posts

Customer service worker, Pulitzer Prize winning satirist, quoted by Snopes, economist, business visionary, lyricist, nemesis of the NRF, creator and editor-in-chief of The Serving Times 🛒, wankyest troll out there https://theservingtimes.beehiiv.com/

theservingtimes.beehiiv.com

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Blame Tag 🏷️ @blametag.bsky.social · 21h

Everything was going fine for one Sarasota , Florida retailer until the unthinkable happened: Jeff quit.

Find out how they handle just a devastating tragedy at The Serving Times: theservingtimes.beehiiv.com/p/nojeffdontgo

Life After Jeff

Store Unable to Function After Worker Quits, Falls Apart Without Him

theservingtimes.beehiiv.com

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Blame Tag 🏷️ @blametag.bsky.social · 1h

Sorry. But that's also why I didn't quote it or even mention the person by name. Though I guess it's pretty obvious.

Blame Tag 🏷️ @blametag.bsky.social · 1h

Bitch no, you did not invent the merkin.

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Blame Tag 🏷️ @blametag.bsky.social · 21h

Life After Jeff

Store Unable to Function After Worker Quits, Falls Apart Without Him

theservingtimes.beehiiv.com

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Blame Tag 🏷️ @blametag.bsky.social · 1d

Zoomed out a little.

A dilute calico cat sitting on a window sill with her fluffy tail sticking through the cat door

Blame Tag 🏷️ @blametag.bsky.social · 1d

Got this weird caterpillar sneaking into the house.

A fluffy tube coming in through a pet door

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Blame Tag 🏷️ @blametag.bsky.social · 1d

Damn, my mother-in-law is one there's still paying. I know because I do her crossword puzzle.

Blame Tag 🏷️ @blametag.bsky.social · 1d

An Adam Sandler fan apparently.

Blame Tag 🏷️ @blametag.bsky.social · 1d

Oh yes.

Blame Tag 🏷️ @blametag.bsky.social · 1d

Captain Planet really failed us in that regard.

Blame Tag 🏷️ @blametag.bsky.social · 1d

Sometimes I'll give it a bidet hosing just to be safe.

Blame Tag 🏷️ @blametag.bsky.social · 1d

Anyway, yeah, if she fired me I'd have ratted her out for sure and she knew that.

Blame Tag 🏷️ @blametag.bsky.social · 1d

The general manager might've done it if she hadn't also had her son and one of our cashiers do a strip tease before each show to raise money for The Will Rogers Institute.

Not altruistically, to win the donation contest corporate ran each year. Bet the other GMs still wonder how we pulled it off.

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Blame Tag 🏷️ @blametag.bsky.social · 1d

Here we go with the mask thing again 🙄

Blame Tag 🏷️ @blametag.bsky.social · 1d

When I worked at a movie theater I almost got fired for posting on the socials that we were "Ready for Magic Mike opening night!" and it was just a picture of all the mops and wet floor signs lined up in the supply room.

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Blame Tag 🏷️ @blametag.bsky.social · 1d

Epilogue:
I sobbed like a little bitch.

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Blame Tag 🏷️ @blametag.bsky.social · 1d

lol, no. It's my dad's stupid joke about Florida and Connecticut being in two different timezones.

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Blame Tag 🏷️ @blametag.bsky.social · 1d

Aaron Is actually came to my store last week and when I yelled out "Aaron, what's going on!?!?" he kind of looked at me like "Do I fucking know you?".

Blame Tag 🏷️ @blametag.bsky.social · 1d

"Okay then, what specifically do you need?"

"I need to speak with someone in the returns department."

Bro, don't drag me into your dumbfuck circular logic.

Blame Tag 🏷️ @blametag.bsky.social · 1d

Why the crap do people ask questions and then complain about the answer?

Dude seriously asked me "Where's the returns the department?"

I told him and he starts whining that he was already there and they didn't help him. Okay, so then why'd you ask how to get there, fuckface!?

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Blame Tag 🏷️ @blametag.bsky.social · 1d

lol, I love Clean.

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Blame Tag 🏷️ @blametag.bsky.social · 1d

All those sci-fi future movies used the blue filter when they should've been using the piss filter.

Blame Tag 🏷️ @blametag.bsky.social · 1d

Sal Capicola.

(The "Sal" is short for "Salami")

Blame Tag 🏷️ @blametag.bsky.social · 1d

Conversation with my father-in-law.

Hi Matt, Did you receive my Hill's dog food?

Unfortunately I'm at work right now, but I'll let you know when I get home around 6pm. 6pm my time, not sure what time it is there with the time zone difference.

Ok.. I'm in the same time zone as yours Eastern Thanks

I'm in the southern.

Blame Tag 🏷️ @blametag.bsky.social · 1d

The Muppets but they're labeled as "Antifa"

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Blame Tag 🏷️ @blametag.bsky.social · 1d

Think I'll watch it tonight while my wife's at her work conference. Don't need her to see me blubber like that.

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